Day 20 The N Word?

 Mark Twain wrote that
“the difference between the almost right word and the right word is really a large matter.”

So my hunger pains in the morning are So bad 😦 its almost like I can’t wake up fast enough to eat, they literally hurt so bad. So this morning when I go downstairs to make something my mom brings up this article she just read. In which a high school teacher (or a different level of education) called Whitney Houston a Nigger on his Facebook.  So while she is explaining on why she doesn’t think the punishment fit the crime (he was suspended), and that he shouldn’t of gotten reprimanded at all, I was biting my tongue.

I usually have the “i don’t give a fuck additude” practically all the time, but this time I was actually in favor of it. Why would a EDUCATION TEACHER use “nigger” to DESCRIBE Whitney Houston? Honestly?

You couldn’t of found a better word to use to describe someone? Unless you were trying to piss on her grave.

That is of course, he said “Whitney Houston was my nigga!” (which could be, I actually didn’t read it lol), then I could understand. But what kind of M O R O N uses a  RACIAL SLUR to describe someone who just died. Yeah.. I think this may just be a little case of racism. How else could you POSSIBLY justify that. Unless you are on drugs.

I wonder if he was on drugs and doesn’t remember logging onto Facebook and writing a status about Whitney…. hmmm..

ANYWHO

I obviously wrote my Facebook status about it (apparently I found a good reason to have 5000+ friends), and you got people saying its America and you can say what you want, then you get people trying to define it.

30 comments (the smoking and obesity one had over 75 haha).

“No one should be using that word.. Any word that insults or offends someone shouldn’t be used..”

“Say nigga and its all good !! The other one is offensive because of what it means …. Nigga is like saying what’s up homie or what’s up brah , I still don’t use it but see a lot of my friends say it Haha … And a lot of my friends are black so I feel weird using that word ”

“Its a very touchy subject becuz how the word started. Today its rarel used in the same term as it was in the old days, but to some it still holds the same weight. Me i lived in prejudice and ive dealt witb prejudice but it doesnt control my life. People give this word too much power.”

“Who said they can use the word freely? Who ever thinks they can use the word freely. Go to the south side find some thugged out ass nigga and say that word “freely” and see wtf happens lmao.”

“i agree. i say nigga all the time. if its such a horrible word than maybe it shoukdnt be in every fuxking rap song every 5 words”

^(This is what my mom was trying to get at. That since its being used without questioning morals/values/racism, that why should a teacher get suspended for saying it on his Facebook).  I can understand this point BUT he used it in a derogatory manner. In a way that was meant to hurt, or “bash” whitney. He didn’t just MISTAKENLY said it, like it just slipped. It was intentional and SHOULD be recognized. ESPECIALLY because he is suppose to be someone people look up to, who listen to, and grow from. It’s a bad example and he needs to know the severity of ignorance and what it will cost you.

The N-Word is no different. And because this word is only a word, black people have to stop getting offended at its use by white people. I personally am more offended when a white person tries to use it the way we do or in the spirit of camaraderie. And my uneasiness has more to do with the fact that it comes out so unnaturally and phony. That word has become a part of who we are and so it rolls off of our tongue naturally. White people will never be able to say the word in a way that doesn’t make every listener cringe. After all, there are millions of words, whether you want to insult or edify someone, at your disposal. It won’t hurt white people if they can’t use this one — will it?
(this is actually from rolling out.com but when I found the picture I read the article and I COULD N O T HAVE SAID IT BETTER MYSELF!)

You don’t see me walking down the street saying what up cunt? Words (good or bad) should not be ignorantly used, (this could even stem as far as last weeks psych class and how this girl called W. Houston a “piece of shit” LIKE WHAT THE FUCK?! Did you personally know her? WHy would ANYONE ever judge someone on their way of life. You do NOT know peoples struggles and judging someone before you actually know someone is ruthless and so sad), because words HURT. Words do not just disappear from ones mind/thoughts.

words =powerful. VERY POWERFUL. Use them wisely. 

Sorry, I’ve been ranting a lot and I wish everything that comes out of my mouth is recorded because remembering all my KEY points is hard, especially when I have PB&J blondies cooking in the oven.

This turned out okay. Had I made them correctly they would definitely curb a sweet craving. I added PB2 instead of actual PB. And I didn’t use all the B. Sugar they wanted.

So it was sweet, not TOO sweet, but def not enough PB taste 😦
But no big deal, they are half gone. Awesome.

So real quick :

9am green smoothie (spinach banana mango flax fiber ice orange juice and L-Carnitine).
&& I ate some PB&J squares.

1pm “meatloaf” and some leftover cauliflower “potatoes” (only ate 1/2).

2pm Leg Work Out:

Deadlift:

2 sets of 10reps x 65lbs

1 set of 8 reps x 75lbs

1 set of 6 reps x 85lbs

Back Ext:

3 sets of 8 reps x 45lbs

Lunges:

2 sets of 25 reps x 40lbs

2 sets of 25 reps x BW

Leg Ext:

1 set of 12 reps x 65 lbs

1 set of 10 reps x 80 lbs

2 set of 9 reps x 95lbs

1 set of 8 reps x 110lbs

1 set of 6 reps x 125lbs

1 set of 4 reps x 140lbs

3pm Myofusion and Banana Protein Shake.

330pm Took Marley to Mike’s house , so she could meet Deuce. I have some really cool pictures of the two together. Deuce was like in LOVE with Marley and wouldn’t leave her alone. They played for a hour straight (played in the water with the ducks too lol) and now she is PASSED the fuck out on the couch.

6pm Ate the rest of the meat loaf and cauliflower.

So……. I’m debating whether to go out or not tonight. I would drive…. be the big DD, but I KNOW I will drink 😦 I succumb to peer pressure thats why I don’t ever go out. Granted it wouldn’t be that bad (but if I have to drive they can suck it), but I don’t want those extra calories. Since I more a shot girl then mixed drink or beer, so lets google how many calories are in a shot of vodka.

The last one has less calories right? 😉

70 Proof Vodka

On average, 70 proof vodka (35% alcohol) has 85 calories per shot (1.5 ounces).
This is approximately 55 calories per ounce.

80 Proof Vodka

On average, 80 proof vodka (40% alcohol) has 100 calories per shot (1.5 ounces).
This is approximately 65 calories per ounce.

 90 Proof Vodka

On average, 90 proof vodka (45% alcohol) has 115 calories per shot (1.5 ounces).
This is approximately 75 calories per ounce.

100 Proof Vodka

On average, 100 proof vodka (50% alcohol) has 130 calories per shot (1.5 ounces).
This is approximately 85 calories per ounce.

Yeah.. no thank you.

  1. If I was able to, I’d rather have a cupcake.
  2. You can’t go to Chicago counting calories. AND RIGHT NOW I HAVE TO!

HMMMMM I don’t know. It’s about 7pm, I probably have another hour or so to decide. Mike kind  of wants to go, maybe just needs a DD lol so maybe Ill do it for him. jk. thats stupid.

Got to stay focussed.

Bikini comp details/ LIFESTYLE CHANGE!

So far, I haven’t craved anything really. The baking curbs any need for “sweets”.

What are my have snacks or desserts?

  • Lara Bars
  • Green Smoothies.
  • Sugar cookies (made with chickpeas)
  • Justin’s Almond Butter Packets
SO this is what I turn too when I am craving something sweet.  I do want to get raw cacao now, because all my recipes call for it.. and I’ll finally be able to have some chocolate!  As you know, I have my little guilty pleasure of diet sodas and SF Red Bull. Usually getting a drink helps me not want to snack which is good. Baking also helps when your hungry, because it takes time, but when the product comes out, thats the hardest lol.
Lately I’ve been having GREAT will power, and haven’t thought about bingeing (Greg did leave a twix on my desk and I was so fucking pissed). :/

However, I am tired lately, but it’s probably a combination of lack of carbs and working out regularly now. I did look in the mirror at a bad angle and it kind of warmed my blood a little bit. Ugh I am so fucking impatient. I think that bingeing for 4 weeks straight is going to just DISAPPEAR in 20 days.. LOL .. of course I don’t (irrational-this is not biggest loser) and I tell my clients this all the time. It is fun to watch your body transform though. Speaking of which, I have to start taking progress pics tomorrow. NOT happy. And I won’t show any of you readers then till probably the end of the contest prep. I will however post a before and afters blog tomorrow 🙂 It’s just a little motivation for myself. ❤

I am going to go make another protein shake and then I am going to head to bed. I think I need to start organizing this blog a little more. I feel myself getting overwhelmed. umph.

Goodnight ❤


Advertisements
Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

2 thoughts on “Day 20 The N Word?

  1. April says:

    the hardest part is seeing NO results at all.. it’s too slow! you gain so much so fast during a binge, and it takes forever to see yourself again 😦 i feel like that all the time.

    • ohshititsmar says:

      Yeah thats for damn sure :(:(:(:( its like oh hey coming up to 3 weeks now and I still look like shit lol. but then again i did binge for I swear a month solid of HIGH CALORIE foods 😦

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: