well hello there.. *waves*

So as you obviously may know it is not the 13th (the day I said I would return), but I just approved a comment from a lovely person asking me to not give up and continue blogging about my experience (and it put the BIGGEST smile on my face), so I just might.

I do have a lot 3 different posts that are just sitting in my all posts section either waiting to be posted or perhaps may sit unpublished forever (who knows). However I think it is a good idea to blog about my last week of contest prep since the last two are probably the most important.

In an unpublished post I explained my reasoning behind stopping the blog for a moment, but since this one will be sent out first I’ll explain again.. The reason I was put this blog on hold was because I had no time. The time that I did have in between other things, I was closing my eyes to try and get minutes of something I think people call sleep. This last week are my finals, so I had a 12 page paper due Friday. I wrote it but I never turned it in. Why? because I hate the teacher and I am going to take the class over again. I have a homework assignment due today (sunday), a 3 hour exam on Monday, a 3 hour exam (that I don’t know If I am going to for psychology) on Wednesday, and my sports nutrition paper due that Wednesday as well. Okay..so this is all happening around the most crucial part of competing. Not to mention I work a 9-5 at a body shop where all I do is babysit, but thats besides the point. I am at the gym at 6am to do cardio, work, class, back to the gym again for a lift and 30-45 min of cardio. You can tell I am drained.

So. Those are my excuses and I apologize. I did find time today (and after I read that beautiful comment), I decided to do a little update status. Granted I believe I will post a little more during the week, but please don’t think they are going to be as detailed as the last ones lol. I never knew blogging actually took as much time as it does.. Oh naive little Marissa.

ALRIGHTY!!!!! So.. down to the last week.

Progress Pictures:

Sorry.. my ab picture isn’t showing up.. its all upside down :/

..and yes my ass did get smaller…….

 

The Food Log:

I will be consuming spinach, broccoli, asparagus, chicken, ground turkey and MAYBE tuna. lol. But yep, hows that for a diet? lol.. and yes this is a “diet” my lifestyle however is NOT. please do not mix and twist my words. Diets suck. My lifestyle is enjoyable.

Check list: Bikini, Heels, Tickets, Bottle of Tanning Lotion, Sponges, Bikini Bite, Fake Eye Lashes.

Still Need:

  • Hotel Reservations.
  • Rental Car.
  • NPC Card.
  • Mac Makeup.
  • Hair cut/dyed.

Everything else will fall into place. This is what the rest of the week looks like..

Monday: Early Cardio, Work, Final Exam, Gym again.
Tuesday: Early Cardio, Work, Hair Cut, Gym again.
Wednesday: Early Cardio, Work, Final Exam/Paper, Gym again.
Thursday: Early Cardio, Work, Nails, Gym again.
Friday: Early as FUCK cardio (MAYBE), Tan, Check in @ USA gym, do nothing.
Saturday: SHOW TIME! Tan, Makeup, Hair, 1030am Prejuding, 5-6pm Night Show.
Sunday: PIG THE FUCK OUT!
Monday: Back to normal ๐Ÿ™‚

So my life is a little hectic, but at least I found time to breathe right? Everything is going alright I suppose. The bikini is a little small for my doing, but I will just rock it anyways (spent $150 on it and its non returnable lol).. really just wanting this all to be over so I can go back to my normal way of living lol. I am just now always on a schedule and I have NO time to even take a step back and calm myself (which isn’t good.. stress= cortisol)..

but I have been thinking ALOT about after the show.

I am really hard on myself, and with my past of bingeing I have always let myself go after a contest prep. Some do, some don’t, but this year I won’t. I am healthier and stronger and wiser then last year. I did this just to do it, but NO award, no trophy, not even placing won’t do a damn thing to how I will live my life after all this. I usually ALWAYS need a reason to “diet”.. oh I’m ย training for a show, or even it being the beginning of a new week, I just always needed a reason.. well.. not anymore.. Living how I have been living for these past 3 months has changed something in me.. something that has been wrong for awhile. I FEEL my work outs in the gym. I squeeze my muscles and actually feel the power when I lift the weights, it is so stress relieving. These endorphins are incredible. I love feeling how I feel when I am working out, or even just feeling healthy. It is SUCH a difference, and this is coming from someone who HATED themselves years ago. Time changes a lot of things, so does actually caring about yourself/body.

Anywho, that was a quick update for y’all.. I am sure I will be posting more (the last few days you don’t really do much but lay around because your energy is so low).. but I do want everyone to know that you can do this. Trust me.. it was 3 months of solid hard work, but when I show you these pictures that NO ONE has ever seen before (and yes they will probably get used against me some time in this cyber world which is OKAY with me), you will understand what I am talking about. I was FAT. No joke… and yes it wasn’t always rainbows and butterflies but this is the outcome of hard work. The food did not suck (just be smart, healthy doesn’t have to mean shitty tasting!!!), but getting up and HAVING to move and sweat and burn, did. Working out isn’t always fun and you sometimes may not want to, but the rewards that come when you do are so worth it. Just remember.. it didn’t take a day to put it on, so be patient.

Thanks guys for all the love and support. โค

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14 thoughts on “well hello there.. *waves*

  1. Yay! So glad you’ve written an update! Girl, I feel exhausted just reading your current schedule. And doing all of that on pretty much zero carbs? I take my hat off to you!

    You are looking fantastic! Not only your butt, but your hammies and quads.

    I’ve also been thinking about putting up my ‘fat’ photos on my blog. It’s a friggin scary to do, right?! Like you said, the rewards for the hard slog are so worth it. When I look at those pictures it reminds me mostly of how I felt. Uncomfortable, self conscious, upset with myself, out of control, unhealthy. They serve as a reminder to me to keep going, even when I think I just can’t be bothered.

    Whew! Sorry about the novel, just want to say congrats on all your hard work and thanks for sharing your progress.

    • ohshititsmar says:

      hi love ๐Ÿ™‚

      I have majority of my carbs on leg day (which I train twice a week) so that’s good.. other then that this upcoming week will be a lot worse (in regards to carb intake).. but I feel as soon as this week is over (school and competition) I will be able to finally breathe.

      I don’t mind it all that much except I don’t know what I was thinking about doing this all at once.. but I am hanging in there.. I def am exhausted by the end of the night.. I literally try to sneak 5 minutes of shut eye anywhere I can lol..
      and as far as the fat photos go.. I suppose after being put on a public website for everyone to see/comment made me realize that EVERYONE has their own comment or some bullshit to say and you cant please anyone.. so why not just please yourself and win that battle?

      YUP! so fuck it. I was fat before, point being…?

      I felt like I was always sad. ALWAYS uncomfortable, SUPER unhealthy too.. It really all happened after a bad breakup “ish” … binged for 3 months straight.. and Im talking thousands of calories per day. I was lost. But that was past tense. I know who I am and I won’t go back there again. I have to keep these fat pictures because Ill never look like that again, ever. Mark my word.

      It has been a long journey but I am glad I am on the road to discovering peace within myself, and let me tell you it is SO worth it. I feel worth it.

      And don’t be sorry about writing (like I want to do now actually haha).. but thank you for all your comments. I appreciate them and think about them even after I close my lap top for the day.. or hour… lol ๐Ÿ™‚ Have a good week sweetheart.

  2. JWo says:

    I for one am glad that you are back. I don’t remember how I found you but I have enjoyed reading your posts and find them motivating.

    My wife and I are the on-again-off-again workout people but seeing your posts has helped me focus more on what we are eating instead of just going through a routine only to destroy it by chasing it down with ice cream later.

    Glad you are back and good luck on everything… You definitely have a VERY full plate, or should I say plates!!

    JWo

    • ohshititsmar says:

      I take “on and off again” work outs to awholenother level. I am THEEE most extreme on and off again work out (er) actually. Even from gaining a shit ton of weight and then busting my ass for 3 solid months.. so I COMPLETELY understand.. and its so much easier when you live and are with someone.. some how it becomes its own validation. Stay with it though.. if you just stick with it, the changes you see will continue to motivate you guys.. just have patience, and faith that one day you will be where you want to be physically and mentally.

      Thank you for the kind words, it really means a lot. If I can do or help you guys in any way you know where to find me ๐Ÿ™‚

  3. jlgentry says:

    Good to read the post! Best of luck on the school work. As far as the contest goes, you will shine. You have the right attitude. I’ve recently rediscovered a lot of myself through a new style of running. Watching your commitment has been one of several things helping me stay on track. We are all rooting for you!

  4. Your work ethic and will power are impressive. I always look forward to reading your posts and I am glad your keeping it up I know how hard it can be when life gets busy but somehow checking in can be motivating in its own way. It’s brave of you to share before and after photos and anyone that knocks you isn’t worth a second thought because clearly your living in the amazing after which rarely happens! Thanks for inspring me to work hard every day when I am at the gym ๐Ÿ™‚

    • ohshititsmar says:

      I am glad I can be the reason for someones inspiration because I know how I look up to alot of people and knowing I might be that person to someone is inspiring all in its own. I appreciate you taking the time to read and leave a comment. Every comment touches me, no lie.

      Keep doing work :), and if you ever have any questions never hesitate to ask…

  5. Joe says:

    It was really nice to read your new post while I was at the beach earlier today,…I’m glad that my reply post made a difference,… You have to understand Marissa since I just found out about you I took the phrase “Going Through a Rough Time” at face value, not knowing that there was/is a competition coming up n your finals are happening as well,… But it worked out well,…

    I think,… if you hate that teacher, you should file your essay, n pass his or her class,… being successful is what really annoys n aggravates haters,… ( jus sayin )

    And for the competition, you sound like your ready, physically, but still alittle cautious mentally, but the photos I posted was to build your self confidence,… you already did one competition, and you how great you look,…. thats why I posted those photos,…and we both know, that if those other guys n gals can do a competition, you can too,…

    Reading the list of things you need for your second competition, … I hope you take the time n take photos, of you all tanned, with your hair done in your new conpetition suit,… Those photos are just as important as your work out routine,… Thats what your striving for,… Each competition your reaching your goal, or eaching the next level to attain your ultimate goal,… I mean the photos of you as you work out are cool to,… But the competition photos,… those are important,…

    Here check these fitness ladies out on facebook, I’m sure they can help better than I can,…

    http://www.facebook.com/Vitrix.Model.Team

    this lady, stephanie, is amazing,.. check it out,

    http://www.facebook.com/pages/Stephanie-Mahoe/212722365420240

    theres other fitness ladies that I follow, n when I see any of their postings I will copy the links, n send them to you for more inspiration,…

    okay, gotta get ready for work tomorrow, ttyl

    • ohshititsmar says:

      Honestly, thank you. My blog was for the intention of capturing what a bikini competitor goes through and I stop blogging around one of the most important times? I don’t know what I was thinking but I appreciated it A LOT.. enough to sit down and write right after I read your comment, so thank you. ๐Ÿ™‚

  6. OMG, it’s this coming weekend!
    Alright, girl. This is the home stretch! You’re going to rock the competition ๐Ÿ™‚
    I’ll be praying for you all the way!

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