Cheesin’ like a motherfucker.

So shit has been going great.. I am staying on track, and keeping up with my workouts.. but the most amazing part of this journey has been falling in love with a great man and on the right steps to loving myself.

They say you can’t fully love until you love yourself. I beg to differ (to an extent). He is the reason I smile and he never fails to put one on my face. He loves me for me, not because of how my ass looks, or whether or not I have abs that day (lol). I know I haven’t really posted about my relationships (mostly because I had none) but figured it took away from the reason I started this blog in the first place. However… it has EVERYTHING to do with it. I have dated assholes who have given me ultimatums regarding competing for a show or staying with that person. I have dated people that think I am shady or cheating on them because I stayed at the gym for one hour too many. I have dated people where I needed to impress them. Never again. I don’t want to have to constantly have a stick up my ass because I’m not feeling “up to par”.. I need to focus on my emotions and really what is causing them. It’s like my whole days goes to shit if I feel that I look like crap, and now.. being with someone that enjoys my company outside of a good body or a pretty face, is life changing. Enjoying life isn’t something I am familiar with, with all these fucked up thoughts constantly running through my brain.

But lately, I feel different. I feel like even though I am the only cause for my interal happiness, he is by far one of the biggest helps in my life. He pushes me to be a better person and truly understands the fight I fight each and every day. He tells me I am beautiful multiply times a day, and I am starting to actually believe it. I don’t need a man in my life (like I did when I was younger), but every part of me wants him.

I have fallen in love with my best friend.

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6 thoughts on “Cheesin’ like a motherfucker.

  1. sweetlyvegan says:

    Im so happy you are happy and in love girly!! You deserve it!!! what a lucky guy! ❤ ❤
    "love is the most refreshing feeling in life!"

    • Marissa says:

      ohhh babygirl!!! Thank you so much and I would be commenting on ur pictures and shit on facebook but I got banned for 30 days lol… I still have something for you and i apologize so much for being a basket case with it.. Hayden is still as gorgeous as ever.. truly blessed you are.. hope motherhood was everything you expected it to be 🙂

  2. Jerry Gentry says:

    This is great to hear. Truth be told, I think its the running, but I’m biased! Keep moving forward. Run free!

  3. April says:

    aww! I know exactly what you’re talking about :)))

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