The process is slow when you want to grow.

..Remember that.. how you can “bulk” and “cut” simultaneously.. is beyond me. Bulking is consuming more calories, where as cutting is the exact opposite. It is very hard and near impossible to put on mass all the while cutting carbs and maxing out on cardio. You have to train smart.
I took way too many different people’s advice when I was becoming a personal trainer turned  “bodybuilder” (really just a fitness freak).. and it was always so condescending. The best advice I could give is grab the basics, and go from there. Tailor it to YOUR needs, not someone else’s cookie cutter bullshit talk. You have to train and eat how your body requires, and what fitness goals you have. I spent so much unnecessary time on the stair master and drooling over food that I thought was “off-limits”, its mind-boggling. I suppose its different coming from someone whose past entails numerous eating disorders and a horrible self body image, but I now know whats right and wrong.This isn’t rocket science.. Kick the bad habits and gain new ones.. You don’t have to starve and you don’t have to live on the treadmill. Listen, you’re going to have to give up some shit.. and some times you’ll hate life because you know you shouldn’t but you just might indulge… so don’t beat yourself up.. everyone needs to start somewhere and cutting cold turkey every bad habit is not likely..
(As I continue to write this, it just so happens that this post is directly related to my giveaway that will be announced shortly…all about having fitness goals working towards them but in a fun and motivating way! Super excited to announce this coming up this weekend 🙂
I personally, want to gain size on my legs and shoulders, and I have to understand that I need to EAT correctly  (and lift), towards my goals even if that means my abs wont be as defined (at this time), or I may be or feel bloated. I may carry a few lbs of water.. It’s all okay. When it’s time and the “cutting” phase starts, that is when I will up cardio when necessary and play around with my carbohydrate fat intake and overall calorie consumption but I will never track it. Yes I know I may never know EXACTLY what and how much I’m consuming.. but this fits me just fine. I don’t care about consuming too many calories as long as their the GOOD ones!!! I don’t care if I eat an extra cup of grapes.. or had one too many sweet potato fries… I can’t think like this anymore.. this obsessive mentality is not healthy for anyone.
All I do know is if I “overeat” I may have to work a little harder on my workouts or do an extra 5 minutes of spin class.. Balance people.
No one will be perfect and you will have fuck ups but its all about how you deal with them. I have chosen to keep eating when I know I shouldn’t have, I have skipped a few workouts here and there.. but this is my life.. and welcome too it.I dont want to beat myself up anymore, I want to look and feel my best and go from there.. I realized how happy I am when I feel that I look good, when my abs show and my quads are defined. I don’t know if its vain or egotistical but I cannot be one of those people who are fine with being overweight. It makes me cringe.. it makes me feel so sorry for them because yes many “don’t care”, there are so many that do and its painful. Losing weight isnt quickly changed with  a few bicep curls and a salad or two.. This takes time. There’s no magic pill besides the magic of a positive attitude so plan to be patient.

I work out 6 days a week. I break my body parts up into Arms (bi’s and tri’s), Shoulders, Back, Quads, and Hams. I do all kinds of rep schemes and always add plyometrics into the mix (jump squats ext).. I lift as heavy as I can with no spot so I be sure to keep my form correct. The least amount of cardio I do a day is 30min. I switch it up between the stair master, a steepest incline on the treadmill and my new-found love in the spin bike.  I always eat breakfast. I eat, for the most part, every 2-3 hours. I eat protein at every meal. I try to keep my fruits in the AM hours only but if I want some later I eat some later. The only carbohydrates I eat are sweet potatoes, brown rice, oatmeal, whole wheat pastas and breads (Ezekiel breads and pastas). I try to drink as much water as possible. I have a cheat meal once or twice a week. Calories in vs calories out.. if I want to work harder and do a two a day, I’ll go out to eat and enjoy whatever I feel like (just remember when you go from eating clean to eating “dirty” you may experience some stomach trouble). I don’t reward myself with food per say but I can enjoy a good burger and fries here and there.

I don’t hate this lifestyle. I don’t mind preparing my own meals or waking up early for cardio. It gets difficult at times, just like any other life would, but this one gives me value. I have learned so many lessons along the way, its hard to always see how far I’ve come..  This lifestyle proves to myself that I do have determination, that I can succeed though all my negative bullshit, (and trust me, there is A LOT of negative bullshit out there.. I work as the only female in a body shop. Imagination people. I can do and WILL do what I plan to do.

There are so many ways to diet and get thin and lose weight, but don’t keep playing these games. You’re fighting an upward battle.. (BALANCE!!!). Put down the food if you’re not hungry. Switch to whole wheat pastas and breads and suck it up. Drink diet instead of regular. Make small changes that will have a huge impact later on…But more importantly promise yourself this is for you. Don’t do this for anyone else, do what makes you happy. Find ways to push harder the next time, not excuses to quit. Eat to live, don’t live to eat. Live by this motto and be positively patient.

It will come.

I can.

 

Training Shoulders tonight. Didn’t get a work out in the morning because we had gotten to bed late. Hit and Run was such  a dumb movie. Not happy 😦 and I now want to be spoiled and never go to a regular movie theater.. now that I know theres one with recliner chairs and a waiter 😉 haha..

I don’t really like posting workouts prior to it being done because I can never follow one plan.. It all happens so randomly.. I go harder than expected or cant finish 12 reps correctly. I don’t want to discourage myself in any way.. I want to do as much as I can. Seriously.. I’m talking, the wrong song playing can throw me off my game..

The main shoulder exercises I do are
Shoulder press (sitting, squat to s. press).
Lateral Raises, Front Raise
Upright Row
and Burpees with a Bosu Ball.

and since the boy is going out of town for the holiday weekend, I want to stay focused. I think I may cheat a tad, but keep consistent in the gym. Even though my gym closes a little early tonight I think I can still get in 45 solid minutes of cardio post lift.

..than finish it off with a casein cake.. fuck yes. No joke…….. so solid.

 

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One thought on “The process is slow when you want to grow.

  1. Thanks so much for bringing up the issue of balance and how it really isn’t right to only listen to what other people say (cookie-cutter thing), but do what works for yourself. Glad you’re discovering what’s working for you and sharing with us!

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