I hate coming up with titles..

I don’t feel well at all. My body aches. I’m holding water/bloated as fuck. Taking a new bc that I swear is already showing its side effects and I didn’t wake up this more for cardio. I think I would care a lot more if today wasn’t friday.. but I have all weekend to get my shit straight ( I don’t want to add too much cardio in at the moment just because I feel bloated). I recently quit smoking again (cold turkey) and getting use to the habit of my mouth being occupied with something lol. But it needs to be done, and the habit gone so I can really give this time my all.

Boy is going away for the weekend for the majority of it. I don’t mind. He needs this time and I see him enough as it is.. can’t be selfish nowadays. Gives me my own time to relax and not worry about timing or needing to be anywhere at a certain time (straight chill mode lol). I do have some quick errands to run and possibly a lunch date with someone but that’s the highlight of it. My mom just went for surgery this morning so I need to be available for the time outside of work anyways. Lucky for her she gets off work for a month :/ what I’d do for a paid month off.. one can only dream..

..back to the boy situation. He’s doing my brakes tonight after work (‘ so nifty).. and I told him we needed to talk. Obviously he asked about what and I said us.. were not officially back together but were going about our businesses like we are.. but there’s still that gray area that could really affect someone when it came down to it. I hope it turns out at least a little how I plan it to.. I want to be with him.. I really do and I will work on us and give 110%, slates washed clean.. but I need to feel that reciprocated. If you don’t feel that you can be faithful, trusted, or even be up to par in a relationship, don’t be in one. I will support and love you thru thick and thin, no matter how hard you push me away. People in your life are supposed to be there for a reason, good and the bad. I pushed you away when I thought that’s what I needed to figure it all out and however was I wrong? It broke my heart and I did it to myself.. then roles reversed and I was pushed away.. why? because you’re going thru a rough time? I want to be here.. nothing you are going thru will make me want to stray. I promise you that.

But, you can’t make people be with you. I think you know what you have, but I think that confidence of finding better shows his face from time to time. It is what it is Mike, and I may be over thinking things but this is why communication is so important. I am glad were talking tonight.. I don’t care if its short and sweet or I go home alone.. people in relationships need to be on the same page. I’d rather be told the truth now then hurt later over a lie.

I may be an emotional wreck sometimes but I’m independent as fuck and I don’t need anyone that doesn’t need me… no matter how fucking sexy they are ๐Ÿ˜‰

Sorry.. life situations.. can spruce up any ol day!

Training a little upper body today. I want to go to X sport Fitness because its open longer and I know my brakes wont be super easy to do. Besides I wont see this cute kid for a little while so I need to make good use of my time.. I also just want to chill.. I won’t have a spin bike but I think I want to split up my cardio time with the treadmill and stairmaster. I am super sore as it is but need to just keep moving..

Trick to being sore, keep moving!

“Third question – foam roll your legs daily to get rid of the soreness faster. Don’t ever skip workouts, this only makes things worse – the best way to eliminate soreness is to train your legs again since this flushes blood into your muscles. The soreness will almost always go away after your warm-up sets.”

“The real expert says: If you’re not sore to the touch and you have your full range of motion, go to the gym. Start with 10 minutes of cycling, then exercise the achy muscle by performing no more than three sets of 10 to 15 repetitions using a weight that’s no heavier than 30 percent of your one-rep maximum, says Docherty.

..and I think I’ll kill two birds with one stone and sit in the sauna (for as long as I can). I’m bloated and sore as fuck. Perfect Friday night ๐Ÿ™‚

Food Log

930am The last of my Dymatize Protein, Nuts and More PB, (flax/chia seeds, maca powder), Ice.
12pm Greek Yogurt/ Grapes

Rest of the food I have:

Coconut Butter
Ezekiel Slice
Steak/ Sweet Potatoes
Whole Wheat Pasta w/ Meat Sauce



Chest and I think a little light upper body.
Plyometrics (as long as I loosen up)

30/30 Treadmill/ Stairmaster

15-20min Sauna.

Stayed tuned announcing the contest in a few hours..



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