Progress.. Or lack thereof.

Just stopped watching a movie because I had the urge to write. 

Things arent going as planned but I suppose if you expect something, you’ll always be disappointed. Not trying to be disappointed anymore. I want to try and make the best out of any situation life throws at me and try to become a better person. I feel like I still have so much in me that has yet to scratch the surface, but stuck finding a way to show it. I guess thats just a part of living..

I took a week off from the gym.. on accident. I swear haha. I don’t know exactly what happened because it was last week but I do know that the 13th was my mans birthday and the 14th was Valentines Day. We went to Texas De Brazil for his birthday (really suppose to be a mix of the two), and enjoyed an aray of meats and a nice salad bar. Oh.. can’t forget the fried bananas and garlic mash on the table at all times (why yes, I did help myself actually). It was a nice dinner, a little odd though. It was kind of quiet.. another situation where I feel like he and I don’t have much to talk about. Thats actually pretty scary considering I want to marry the fucker.. but I think its me overanazlying the situation.. yet again. Maybe its because we work together and are always in contact with each other..maybe.. 

but thats changing and so far, not seeing him everyday has made his presence that much special when I do. I seriously love him with every ounce of my body. 

Okay okay enough with the lovey dovey bullshit. I got him a gift card to bass pro, as unthoughtful as it may sound. I spent quite a few days asking his brother and another fishing “expert” on facebook which fishing reel he may like. Neither had a solid answer so I figured he could just skip the trip of a return and get what he wanted from the geico. He loved it.. even more, the card I got for him which made me feel really good. After the two holidays we ended up going up to Wisconsin for a little ice fishing trip. It was a group of 3 girls and 3 guys and turned out pretty well. Usually with that many people I find it hard for it to be drama free but it kinda was… The only thing was on friday night we all got kind of drunk and thought it was a good idea to take the truck out on the ice and do donuts at 2am..Yea well it ended pretty quickly when we found ourselves stuck on top of a rock for 45 minutes. The girl I was with took videos but I haven’t seen them yet. Which I would figure is a good thing 🙂 On saturday after we got our lazy asses up we headed on the ice. I caught probably 3-4 keepers which is always nice but a few hours later is where the problem lied. The boys told us girls to just head home and they would meet us back there (it was FREEZING), so we listened. As soon as we got in the truck and attempted to drive away, up a slight hill, it felt like we had fallen into a ditch. Okay.. so we reverse and get nothing. Just tires spinning, so I tell her to stop. We were not going any where. She gets out of the truck and looks at her front left tire and her mouth drops. I am laughing at this point and get out thinking it couldn’t be that bad. I walk over, and I was wrong. Her tire looked like it was nicely placed up against her car. Wtf? After a little more inspecting we realize that her 5 lug nuts were completey missing. Unfuckingreal. Luckily I have an amazing boyfriend and was able to jack her car up and able to put the tire back on with 4 lugs from the other truck we had taken. An hour later, we were back on the road headed home. I have heard of Wisconsin people messing with Illinois license plated cars, but COME ON! 

The rest of the trip went well and was back at home around 8pm on Sunday. I stayed over his house ( I live 45 minutes away) just to be closer to work the next day. 

Everything after that I will explain a little later. Things are still a bit rough and don’t need my dumbass saying anything I shouldn’t say so I won’t.

For now.

Anywho, don’t really think I ate that bad except when we stopped at Culvers on our way home but it was do worth it. Double burger with cheese curds. Yeah. Other than that my eating was fine.. just drank a little.. lol. Felt a little bad but I enjoyed that week. I can’t recall any binging which is a good thing but think my body needed a little break. I mean I haven’t taken one in what a month and a half? Alright that sounded like an excuse because to be quite frank I could of enjoyed that week without the booze and added calories but I chose to do what I wanted to. I don’t even think I gained that much weight, maybe a pound or two but what I do know is that my ass got smaller which is a major fail. I swear you work on shit for days even months and its gone in minutes…

So, what does that mean? 

Only that I am kicking my ass harder than I have before. I have about 5 weeks left and although it doesnt seem like much I am going to do my best. So what if I don’t do this show, there is always another one. I just rather be comfortable and confident then just doing something to do it. Being on that stage, if youre not comfortable people can see it. I don’t need that, nor do I want to beat myself up over not placing or looking like shit next to these conditioned girls. BUT the point is that I am still going strong and I will continue to push through these couple of weeks and really prove to myself that I can do it. I want my abs!!!!! I want a huge butt!!!! and FUCK I WILL GET THEM!!!!!!!!

🙂 that is all.

Sent from my iPhone

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2 thoughts on “Progress.. Or lack thereof.

  1. says:

    Hahaha!! I love your posts!!

    Everytime I think I am going crazy or off my rocker I feel so mush better after reading your stuffs!! – no offense to you, I promise!! I don’t know you at all and there are a thousand things going on in a persons life but its nice to relate to someone from across the world!!

    Even though I am not training for a competition I am training and last week was my ‘week off’ as well.. And when I say ‘week off’ I mean gym and food.. I ate basically what I wanted (which was not as bad..stayed on the right stuff most of the time)..

    See, the thing is, I get bored every easily.. Being it a picture, a song, and well yes a gym routine.. As soon as I feel I have to do something I don’t want to do it and when I do something for to long I have to change it!! After reading one of your posts I decided its time to change my gym routine.. I usually did Monday Wednesday Friday Spinning class and Pilates afterwards and Tuesday Thursday Saturday Yoga.. The spinning started getting boring so I changed my Monday Wednesday Friday to weight training.. Staying with the yoga on Tue and Thu.. The yoga helps a lot with stretching the sore and stiff muscles of the weight training and I love yoga..

    My goal.. Is to get fit and firm and maybe I will be happy once I love what I have to look at in the mirror.. I don’t necessarily want to lose weight (a little bit here and there is always a bonus) but I want to take what I have and make it look better!! Make sense??

    O yes and of course I want to do my yoga teachers training course.. But, I have to complete 2years of yoga classes first before I can attempt doing the course! Which I am happy to say, July will be my 2 years so Aug I can start my training and by next year hopefully I will be my own great yoga teacher!! So excited!!

    Love, life, gym routines, eating habits, bad habits, over thinking shit, pms, goal setting, disappointments, achievements.. I have them, you have them.. once again thanks for being you and thanks for great posts!!

    So why did I actually write to you..? Well, just felt like it!

    Have a lovely weekend!! xoxox

    Thanks for reading!!


    Marisa South Africa
    Sent via my BlackBerry from Vodacom – let your email find you!

    • Marissa says:

      I just wrote this long ass comment and deleted and that just made me sad….. Long story short, I loved your comment and hope that my rough journey to inner happiness will help anyone in the same position. Life is hard.. theres no need to pretend that it isnt.

      I hope to hear from you soon and wish you the BEST of luck in your fitness journey. If you ever have any questions you know where Ill be.. 😉

      Again, I appreciate the comment, it made me smile 🙂

      ❤ Marissa

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