You know squat? … Exactly.

So .. I suppose with how many people have viewed my instagram account, has the potential to look at my blog (at LEAST once). Knowing that.. super awkward. I don’t know. I guess I always jump around from professional to .. well not so much. This blog is just a story about me and my life and how it affects my training lifestyle (i.e. eating disorders, emotional eating, plain old life situations ext). I know squat should be taken literally.. not figuratively as in my fitness “wannabe” background. I really lose all focus with insecurities present, that I know I look like a fool.

I also think I over analyze every possible situation.

I might possibly step away from the personal training part of my life till I finish school and get my head above water. Though I truly do love what I do, I have to be taken seriously and I can’t give anyone any reason to doubt me. Maybe I’ll explore other options that could possibly just be a foot in the door instead of wasting time away waitressing or cleaning fucking toilets. Although, if it paid more than what I am now.. I highly think I’d consider.

Can’t be forever right?
🙂

Anyways.. once I think I can manage an actually successful website, this one really isn’t suppose to be taken seriously. I throw in recipes, progress pictures and the word fuck in this blog but in the end the title is what it is in that manor.

On the brighter side, I attempted to squat 205 a couple of times (yes of course with a spot, who I might add, is seriously fantastic)!!!! Notice attempted.. because to be honest.. as much as I work as a personal trainer I need to focus on really getting my act together.. I want to lift heavy, as fuck, for sure but as much as I think I know what I’m doing I don’t fucking do it. Here I am telling my clients to squeeze this, do that but holy fuck it like all disappears from my mind when I train myself… I think I just need to get use to a workout buddy, a spot, simply a trainer training me. But don’t get me wrong, I fucking love it.

Just thought I’d give a clearer idea of what this blog was about. For now, it’s nothing special just random as hell thoughts, pictures and the roller coaster of a ride my life has become..

Anyways, I have to be up soon about 5 hours of sleep to wake up see if a client comes in, sit in sauna, eat take a nap and go back to work. I seriously wish W was as short of a distance that RLB was. I would go home any hour or two I had off.. because well..

I love sleep. 🙂
and eating.

Like my skinny cow ice cream I am about to demolish. Strawberry Shortcake if you wanted to know.

;D

Goodnight xo

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One thought on “You know squat? … Exactly.

  1. Haha my blog is kind of like that, too.
    I just love how you get real and share your thoughts and struggles. It really helps others who are going through similar situations to know they’re not alone. 🙂

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