Tag Archives: Bikini Girl

1/8 week motiv8- Strength.

Well. I’m sure you are all aware that I haven’t written in days weeks.. possibly even months. I don’t even know at this point. things got super hectic, and kind of still are..
I’m going thru this whole thing at work and its slowly draining me. the amount of time and effort I am putting into this job, I should be well off ($$ wise).. but still just skating by paycheck to paycheck. I m seeing an average of 12, 22 being the highest amount, of people every day for training. 2 times a week I am up at 430am (was once, 3 x a week), back home for 2-3 hours then back in the gym from 12-930. This last week however, I have been training every day. So on top of training myself before everyone else (which I don’t know is a good thing because I am always exhausted), I am practically in the gym more than I am home. At one point it took a huge toll on me. I stopped working out and as a result ate like shit (or.. did I start eating like shit in which turned to an absent of those workouts?? hmmmm) and more importantly, felt like shit about myself (and in general, headaches. massive bell aches. Thank you acid reflux).

But just like a roller coaster with its lows, I have been slowly reaching one of those highs. Life has seemed to be turning for the better and I am obviously taking it for granted. I mean, I should right? Appreciate whats right in front of me? The “right now”?? Anyways.. Its sunday, I found a time to write. I actually have been wanting to write earlier but felt that I would feel pressured (like I always do actually). You know I never reread what I wrote? I only spell check it. I get so overwhelmed that I could write for hours, proofread, then select all delete that shit like nothing ever happen.

Tis’ true.

So, instead, I write and say it is what it is and post it. I don’t know. I feel like until I find a smooth transition into a nice blog (like I have imagined) Ill continue to write like there was no delete button…

I actually wrote down what I wanted to cover in this post.. weird. I have never done that before. I just wanted to make sure I mentioned a few things… What I have learned in the last couple weeks, where I want to see myself.. things like that.. The list kind of goes like this (which is actually written on a poster for the 2013 midwest ironman lol).

Do whatever makes you happy.
Strength
-Being strong
8 Weeks
Calories
Weight training
Cardio
1500-2000*
Progress Pictures
Food
Work
Progress

Well, I have been kind of talking about work, so we can cross that one off. Lets being with the 8 weeks. Now, 7 weeks but this was referring to the competition I planned on doing. I don’t think I will be doing it. but I am training like I am. I am taking weekly progress pictures and will post them at the end of the 8 weeks. I am playing around with my macros and added in 3 (30-45) minutes of cardio in this week and next. My calories are ranging from 1500-2000*. I have successfully worked out each week and am super proud about that. I really think I am going to give it my all. I did have a cheat meal today (literally a few minutes before I starting writing) and didnt think I was going to have one for the entire 8 weeks. However, I did just finish the 8 week no cheat and let me tell you that was so hard and I fell right back on my ass. I had a hard time picking myself up because it was mixed with feeling lonely, tired and burnt out from work.. Thats like a recipe for disaster. Any who, I am staying consistent with work outs and even my cheat meals are recorded and kept track of. Speaking of which, I really want to get into the whole macro things. I want to be able to have some solid information and something I can project to other people because not only are my clients asking about it, many people comment or message me with some sort of diet question. I want to be able to just find the post click and paste and be like BAM! problem solved. Yea.. lol. wouldn’t that be nice. But it would still be helpful if I gave the basics of what to do to start losing fat and looking/feeling better. Maybe I will do some research and really put some time and effort into it (dos yes. it may take a while lol). Anyways, I am keeping track day by day what I am doing so we can see what it takes (okay what it takes for me, my bf% food intake ext) to get to where I will be in 8 weeks. I am already leaning up and I couldn’t be more ecstatic. Heres the break down of this week:

Monday 16th- 497 Calories Burned. 1:41:08. (1511 Calories Consumed).
Tuesday 17th- (no heart rate) Did a Back Work Out 15 Min Cardio. (1569 CC*).
Wednesday 18th- 35 Min Plyo and Abs. (1760CC).
Thursday 19th- Stairmaster. (1550CC).
Friday 20th- Went to RLB. Did Legs (Got told I was losing weight**) (2000CC)
Saturday 21st- Forgot what I did. OH! Went with Marley to the kids playground and did a work out there. 255 Calories Burned. (1800CC).
Sunday 22nd- (HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOM)!!- Almost an hour @NS Did Upper body and ended with heavy glutes. 394 Calories Burned. (2500CC My “Cheat Meal” Day).***

*Calories Consumed
** Yes, this is technically what I want but the reason I put this here, was because when I went to my notepad to reread what I did for the week, I saw this. I would say on Monday or Tuesday of this week, a member of my gym went up to my trainer and asked him if I was gaining weight. FIRST OF ALL, ITS NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS! Like for real. Who does that… Unless.. never mind. lol. BUT, I was told this by him the second I was flabbergasted by this guy whom I have never seen at the gym before (and trust me, I know everyone lol), came up to me while I was with a client and introduced himself to me. THEN HE CAME BACK A SECOND TIME DURING HER SESSION!!! How rude. Shes a paying client. Anyways, I wasnt bragging but I NEEDED to tell CYlia and he was right by.. It was like, oh hey apparently you’re cute enough to be hit on, but some dude notices and thinks its an important enough question to be concerned if Im gaining weight. Unreal. But that’s the reason I even acknowledged it. Am I cute, fat, up and down? Lmao. I could care less. I am doing what I can to be the best that I can. If that “best” is not good enough, pretend I don’t exist. I need to learn this process of loving myself and being fit is one step closer. Being vain, egotistical, have your way but I need to love the body that I am in. With everyone else so concerned on how I look.. I can’t let being fit be a quick fix. I don’t want to starve like I have. I don’t want to spend the time I already don’t have on hours of cardio to look like a bag of bones. I want to be STRONG and being strong isn’t a walk in the park.

***This is what I DO. YOU CAN NOT DO WHAT I DO!!! I am 153ish pounds at 5’6-5’7 (lol). You need to hire someone who do some research and play around a bit. SO DO NOT COPY THIS!!!!!!! I do suggest not going under 1500 calories. That seems like a lot to most of my new clients (because they are used to being starved. Thank you Jenny Craig). But as long as you are staying active, you need that so your body doesnt hate you later.

Oatmeal mixed with 1/3c unsweetened apple sauce with pan seared apples and cinnamon.

Oatmeal mixed with 1/3c unsweetened apple sauce with pan seared apples and cinnamon.

I know this looks gross but it was so good. Chicken with mozzarella on a rice cake.

I know this looks gross but it was so good. Chicken with mozzarella on a rice cake.

10 Egg Whites Stevia Cinnamon- to taste. I beat the eggs to a stiff peak and baked it for 12 minutes at 350 degrees. Rolled up and drizzled with Walden Farms PC Syrup.

10 Egg Whites
Stevia
Cinnamon- to taste.
I beat the eggs to a stiff peak and baked it for 12 minutes at 350 degrees. Rolled up and drizzled with Walden Farms PC Syrup.

If you are a nutritionist or some kind of guru and tell me I am doing something wrong, please save it. I have been doing this for years and am playing around with what feels good. I get there is a PERFECT SCIENCE.. but for me… I will do it for a bit then have a total relapse. I need to find a way in which fits me to a tee. Not something I set myself to crash and burn. I need to do what makes me happy.. To be honest, I want to try to be gluten free, that and I want to do a blood test in which it tells you what foods to stay away from ext… I think that would be super interesting (I already know I have acid reflux 😦 ) . In the mean time, I am playing with LOW (not NO carb) and high fats. So far, I havent really felt any differences in regards to bloating or water retention. I think I may pay a little more attention to that.

AMAZING eggs on the way to work. I think this was 3 whole eggs 1/8c milk and some cheddar cheese :O

AMAZING eggs on the way to work. I think this was 3 whole eggs 1/8c milk and some cheddar cheese :O

I think I knocked out a couple of those topics on that list. Other things I wanted to mention is the first one on the list, the quote :do whatever makes you happy” and it is something I will always say in the back of my mind when faced with a decision. Whatever I may be unsure about I will always ask myself if it makes me happy, WILL it make happy. I think that is so important, and es it may be easier said then done, but at the end of the day its your life. its your feel good moments memories and smiles.
..and in my case, I not only want to feel good I want to look good to feel good. I don’t know what it was that made me jump into this field but I honestly and truly don’t think I could see myself in anything other than fitness. I may be obsessed or have gone thru the unhealthy ways to get to the healthy ones, but I want to make a a difference and I think helping people help themselves is where I want to start.

Wow.. well didn’t expect that to come out so well… I think I need to just keep writing to ensure I keep this mood going.

A few other things, there are a few pictures of the foods I have been eating. Again. I have been tracking EVERYTHING I eat. Nothing has gone over 2000 calories, nothing under 1500. Boyfriend and I are doing good. I think once I started focusing on myself (working out ext) I stopped being so high-strung. I realize MY life is important. I feel like I go thru these moments all the time though. Like super into working out and loving myself then one day I just crash and burn. No this is not me being negative, just being realistic here..

The boyfriend grilling some meat for me :)

The boyfriend grilling some meat for me 🙂

The beans are NOT mine ;P

The beans are NOT mine ;P

Though, I think this is it. I feel really good about this one. I am going to do this for 8 weeks. THEN I will reevaluate the situation. I did the 8 week no cheat, what would make this any harder? I just need to work out and prep my meals. Thats it. I am already at the gym 58394 hours of the week, I have NO excuse not to get shit done.

&& trust me.. Im about to get shit done.

😛

Other than that, I did want to (and have been wanting to) write about strength and being strong, but I think I am going to save that until the end or at least the 8 week pit stop of this road to ripped trip.. Yea.. I think Ill do that.

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Leave a comment, win a prize*

My first ever giveaway, all thanks to Slimkicker.com!

Contest began Monday (9/10) @ 10am and will end Sunday (9/16) @ 10pm.

The winner will be announced one week from today.. and will be awarded an awesome prize!

To enter, simply leave a comment of 1-2 sentences with a fun fitness or diet challenge!

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Post Comp/ Weekend Recap

Well that sucked.

Lmfao. I don’t even know where to begin. I wrote a Thursday post but never posted it for some reason. I’ll start from there I suppose. So I had to wake up extra early to finish cardio before I had to pick up my bosses kids for school (yeah…. I know).. But regardless the day went as planned. After work I headed over to the nail place, got acrylics and my toe nails painted. This took about an hour, at which point I went directly to Taylor’s salon. We ended up doing an all over, an eggplant color. This took about 2 hours at which point, was already 930 at night, but still made it to the gym to do some cardio and sit in the sauna. After I finished with her I went right to the hotel and tried to unwind.

Friday morning wasn’t as hectic as I thought. I got up thinking that they had a fitness center in the hotel but they didn’t. No big deal I just went to X Sport down the street, finished cardio and on the way home stopped at Sunset foods (which is like a Whole Foods), and got a turkey and some sugar free cookies for after the show. I was running a little behind only because I called Taylor’s salon and she wasn’t there yet so I waited for her text to tell me to come by. We started my tanning process a little before noon. I was there till 3 fucking o’clock. This Jan Tana BULLSHIT was just that, bullshit. Turned me black and did NOT look good sprayed on. So after I left her salon looking like a fucking moron, I went back to the hotel. I wasn’t that upset because I still had time to get sprayed (she had another solution she wanted me to try), but I fell asleep for a couple hours. I woke up at about 630pm and Mike came over. We picked up Marley and headed over to Bridgeview, Il to check in at the gym over there. I was running so fucking late. Why I took a nap before check in is beyond me, but I literally made it with 5 minutes to spare. 5 minutes. 7:55pm no joke. After all this I went back to the hotel and we just chilled. Marley was being the biggest pain in the ass and I had no idea why but Mike left for a bit and I fell back asleep.

Taylor came over at midnight (after I kept falling asleep), and we started spraying another coat of this tan called Fake Bake (which she originally wanted to use prior to using the jan tana color) but I was hesitant because its not a competition spray.. I understand it may get someone dark but on stage is awhole nother story. You should be BLACK … lol.. she finished at about 2am. She left, mike came back and I laid upright in bed for 2 hours.  Got up at 5am, took a shower to wash off the excess solution, but the entire tan came off. So at 530 am on the morning of my comp, I was about as pale as they come. Awesome.

Well, Taylor came back at 530am, and wanted to just spray just this bronzer on me but I remembered we had another bottle of a different solution made by jan tana, so.. I got naked, stood in front of the mirror and we both started applying this solution. Well.. it looked better. I guess.. if better just means I looked….. uh different? lol.. I was streaky as fuck and just getting pissed. I needed to be out the door at 7am because I had a mandatory meeting at 830am in CHICAGO (which not to mention is FUCKING BULLSHIT! that and the whole checking in at USA gym.. just is so stupid and you would think they know that this whole thing is stressful enough).. whatever.. anywho…. so as I’m getting pissed.. hair is still curly as all hell.. and still had to finish my hair and put my make up on as my tan tried to dry. Ohhhhhhhh the time just flew by. Taylor was patient as shit with me (God bless her) and we finally got all our shit together and I was on the road at 730am.. traffic was a little bad at times because of some summit shit but I got to there within 45 minutes. Not like I really could of gave a shit.. but whatever.

So I got to the theater, found a semi decent parking spot and just sat there. It was raining… I had no umbrella or anything to cover my hair body or face with… so I just sat there for another 2 minutes ready to just book it. People were piling in, and vendors were setting up.. I waited for Taylor and we got some final touches done.. Bloated, streaky, hair frizzy, and bikini too small… I felt like shit.. especially seeing these beautiful ladies.. beautiful TANNED ladies… lmao.. ughhhhhhhhh…

Alright well it was what it was.. I really didn’t have time to take any pictures (it was so packed in the pump up room), and it was STICKY in there. This is a huge problem. My hair.. yeah.. unless you know me personally you’ll never understand. my hair is fucking crazy. I could feel it getting worse. I couldn’t stop touching it. I didn’t know what to do.. not to mention NO PONYTAIL HOLDER???? Really???????????????? Since when don’t I have a scrunchie? fuck me. Yup and then they called bikini tall. Lined up. Last one in line. Couldn’t stop grabbing my ass, complete wedgie. Why? forgot bikini bite. After hours of “preparation”… yes I borrowed some but I should of done it WAY earlier.. Oh so picture me.. fidgeting with my hair, my ass, and walking like I have something in my ass. OIL SHOULD NOT BE ALLOWED IN THE PUMP UP ROOM.. Guys don’t care because they are bare foot, so they just drip that shit errrrrrywhere. Yes I just  want to bitch.. Well yeah so that was me. Even on stage. Most embarrassing 5 minutes of my life. Why? I KNEW I wasn’t ready and I was just doing this because I felt obligated. Yes I worked hard but I took this like it was just something I signed up for. I wasn’t ready. I knew it. I am upset with suitsyouswimwear, my bikini was not custom made.. I was holding water like it was nobodies business… My hands are still black from the original Jan Tana tan (my elbows? Oh yeah.. I look like a giraffe or a cow.. whatever.. oh yeah.. actually… a cow fits me PERFECTLY!) Seriously though, I apologize. I’m not fat per say, but I sure did feel it. I took pictures after I got home from breakfast that are currently uploading..

Okay back on track.. so yeah blahblahblah got my happy ass off stage real fast, gathered my shit up and went to breakfast. Please see below:

How AMAZING! Only finished half of each(okay more then half of my waffle… but that’s because we were there for awhile and I knew I wasn’t going to take home a waffle.. so I couldn’t help myself!) lol my stomach was hurting.. So after breakfast I went back to the hotel to actually check in for another night.. I had called and asked for a late check out (which was $10 per extra hour) but since the room was less then $60 it was just better to not have to worry about packing up and going home since my sister just arrived back from Minnesota… so I went back up to my room and chilled out for a bit, while I did my own photo shoot.. please don’t be offended, you should know by now but I take provocative pictures.. Please see below as well:

haha yeah.. so that was me bloated.. okay even MORE bloated after that wonderful waffle creation.  Lmfao.. also stopped at a “chocolate factory” haha.. it was a tiny chocolate store I saw on the way to breakfast.. Got cookie dough dipped in chocolate.. then finished my night with Buffalo Wild Wings.. my FAVE restaurant lol and ate part of my life away there too… Ordered whatever I wanted without a care in the world. Felt awesome. I don’t remember what time I feel asleep but I woke up Sunday, at 930am feeling fully charged.

I finished packing up my shit and checked out of the hotel at 1130am and headed home. Found my sister, or rather my sisters clothes EVERYWHERE.. sucks I don’t have my own room when she comes home because she steals shit. And thinks shes entitled to whatever she wants to do.. meaning all my shit is moved and whatever lose odds and ends I may have had lying around are misplaced or taken for ransom or until I find it in her purse a week later. I took a nap for a few hours, got up, got in a fight with my sister, and about an hour later I left to go meet up with mike so we could go to coldstone. yep. coldstone.. lol

Even though it sucked because I didn’t add in enough shit lol. So it was basically ice cream.. but it was still better then chicken and broccoli. Thatsferdamnsure.

Blahblahblah and now its Monday. Clean relaxed eating now.

Literally feel awesome. I don’t have to worry about anything anymore, except lifting big and eating big! I WANT TO GROW! I have SO much potential and it sucks I did something to “track” my progress KNOWING I wasn’t ready but I will continue to go strong. I am so excited to finally be allowed almost twice as many carbs as the last month, and using that energy to kick ass in the gym.. This show was a stepping stone for bigger and better things.. I am STOKED.. seriously fucking ecstatic. Game on.

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