Tag Archives: Skinny

Day 44 We can do anything we want to do if we stick to it long enough.

Wow… the days are just adding up eh?

But when I think about it, that’s like 6 weeks.. you would think ID BE COMPLETELY FLAWLESS BY NOW!!!!! haha… not exactly.  Sorry that’s my impatient rant of the day again.. I’M GETTING BETTER I PROMISE!! it takes time, and now the way I look at is, is these are the days of the rest of my life. I will never be over weight, uncomfortable ever again. I will be healthy from here on out :):):):)

Any who.. what do you think 4 weeks of straight binging would do to someone?

At THOUSANDS of calories a day?

Do you think the weight is just going to fall right off? Lol it takes time, and for someone like myself I should know this.. Starving yourself will only get you sicker, and mentally even worse, and throwing up , honestly I think the loss of then enamel on my teeth is because of throwing up for years (all the acid).. that and I have chronic acid reflux (actually had it as a baby) but it’s only gotten worse since throwing up (NO I do NOT throw up or starve myself anymore).

All this progress is healthy eating/living. So for any of you that say you wish you had my body, ext ext.. you can.

But will you sacrifice something for it? Desserts, sugar, simple carbs, fast food ext??

And there is where people tend to stop listening or asking questions 😉

Woke up super late this morning.

Mom was actually the one to wake me up.. and all I did was press snooze and I wake up 10 min before Im usually on the road.. no big deal I wasnt late or anything.. actually forgot to put my make up on. lol

Made a shake though.. running out of flavors to make..

830am Vanilla Whey, Maca/ Superblend Powder, coconut oil and coconut flakes with water and ice.

1030am Had to run some errands. First when to ABT and saw that there was a red mango across the street. Ive never had red mango, but Ive sure as FUCK wanted it.. So I actually wait about 20 min in the car because it didn’t open till 11am.. (even though I found out they WERE open) haha.. I walk in and start asking so many questions the dude just hands me the nutrition book..

I was literally on the verge on leaving with out getting anything 😦 because he said there was added sugar. FUCK.

NOT COOL. but he said the vanilla one didn’t, and I saw that it only had about 12g of sugar. nbd 🙂 I got a little strawberry and not even a spoonful of dark chocolate bites.

Ate that on the road while I went to extreme graphics and picked up some shit that Ron ended up not even liking.. ol well.

1245pm Headed to Whole Foods after. Got 2 chicken breasts and some smoked almonds. Ate /2 of the chicken breast.

Just found out I received my financial aid, nothing what I thought I would get.. I think for the year I got 2000????????? UGHHH why do I always have to be stressed? Fine.. no big deal… I’ll just wait till tomorrow to have someone explain it to me.

Pretty simple today. Sorry going to be a boring blog post after all.. So about 430pm I ate another part of the chicken breast. Didn’t eat much because I was going to stay after work for tequila tuesday and was actually super pumped to stay..

530pm I realized Nikki was going to come and so it just so happened that Eric and I got into a little tiff.. He completely denies it, is actually taking nikki’s side. It was unbelievable. I have the ENTIRE convo on my phone between greg and i, greg and eric, and nikki and I. and THEY ARE STILL LYING ABOUT ITTTT!! and then I had to throw Mike in there because he was a witness and later after I left he told mike it never happened.. oh.. okay. Doesn’t matter Nikki lost a friend, I never had one in her.

630pm Got home, traffic sucked. Walked Marley played with her a bit. Made ground turkey and onions, it was pretty good.

8-1am I went out. lol. and I NEVER go out. I didn’t even anything bad, but didn’t study like I wanted too.

Went to bed around 3am.

Didn’t work out today. Usually have Wednesdays off but I was SUPPOSE to study :/ lol..

Goodnight ❤

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Day 17 There are no shortcuts to any place worth going.

— Beverly Sills


Hard work, dedication, and the ability to stay positive through ups and the downs.  No shortcuts.

If you can imagine it, do it. You will never regret it.

745am I’m running late, because I stayed up a bit later then I would of liked too.. I’m throwing on any clothes that I think would look reasonable and that actually match (I’ve walked out with 2 different boots before, luckily both were black). While I was getting ready I realized that I felt good. My sweater fitted a little looser, and my thighs look like they are thinning out. I mean.. I would hope I see results considering its been 2 weeks.

HOWEVER! This is important to people weight training. PLEASE.. PLEASE DO NOT use the scale for weight loss progress. You will feel defeated EVERY TIME (especially people with disorders and OCD). Just because you weigh more on the scale doesn’t mean exercising and eating right isn’t doing anything. Muscle weighs more then fat. I promise, just keep going.

830am Finished my protein shake in the morning on my way to work.. I work 45 min away from home, so I have a lot of time to think. I usually am such a basket case that I can never had a finished thought, but I’m trying to understand weight loss, and why so many people refuse to change.

Is it because we don’t like change? Or we don’t like change when it comes to ourselves? Is it because food is just so DAMN good? No motivation? No reason too? Don’t care? Too lazy? Not enough time?

Well.. everyone does everything because of something =D

Smokers smoke cigs because they are addicted to nicotine.  Alcoholics drink alcohol because they are addicted to it. Anorexics don’t eat because they are afraid of the image starring back at them.. Bulimics puke because they want there cake and ….well you know.  Men eat whatever they want because they assume metabolism means fatty foods don’t have the same effect as they do for everyone else.

  1. Heart disease, cancer, stroke, diabetes doesn’t care if you have a fast metabolism and don’t gain weight from that double cheeseburger extra fry from Mcdonalds, everyday.
  2. Eating like shit only hurts you.
  3. Healthy eating doesn’t have to suck.
  4. STOP BEING LAZY!

Not enough time? Why use that excuse? I don’t give a rats ass what you do all damn day, if you have 24 hours to breathe, you have 24 hours to get your life back. I can understand to an EXTENT but I am gone for 10 hours a day, go to class for 2 and 1/2 hours, and work out everyday AND make my food for each meal from SCRATCH ALL NATURAL FOODS. soo….. what the fuck?

It’s fine though, I’m not here to preach, I am just trying to understand this ridiculous thought process. I just know more then half of the people out there don’t like how they look naked, but a small majority of those people will actually do something about it.

It’s like if they don’t see results in 3 days they don’t think anythings working.. Well my friend, it took more then 3 days to put it on didn’t it?
Exactly.

Am I the only one that thinks this is common sense?

Maybe it’s not, but hey that’s why I’m here right? To teach people how to live healthy.

I’m sorry. I guess it just bugs me. If you are going to complain about the way you look, or treat people with disrespect because YOU AREN’T HAPPY with yourself, do everyone a favor and cut it out. You can be happy too. I mean who wouldn’t want to love themselves?

Am I being ignorant here? Honestly? I know people can love themselves at any weight and as long as YOU ARE happy and healthy I think you can be whatever size your little heart pleases to be, but if you constantly fight an upward battle with yourself PLEASE ask for help. You have to want to change in order to accept the help, but any step towards a better you is a step worth taking.

“When you find peace within yourself, you become the kind of person who can live at peace with others.”

I have these quote hanging in my room and its so beautiful I smiled when it fit perfectly here.. And its true. I honestly cringe to think about all the hate in this world and how people are living day to day in such depression. I have been to the lowest lows, and thought things would never get better. Obviously I was wrong. I’m here today with a huge smile and such passion for life now it makes me giddy just thinking about how things have changed AND HOW THINGS CAN CHANGE FOR YOU TOO! You just have to believe that, and it’s the honest to God’s truth. I hope from reading my blog I can make you believe in yourself. I can’t make you change, but I can help with the understanding that you can do what you set your heart to do ❤

ANNNNNDDDDDDD that’s that. LOL.

941am & I am already starving. Awesome. I had 1/4 of a coconut cream pie Lara Bar when I was walking in and now I’m drinking tea till 10am, when I have to take a retarded class to set shit up for work. Then I have to study Chapter 8 in between breaks today because I don’t actually think I know anything about chapter 8. Maybe I’ll get lucky on the multiple choice 😉

Because I am online ALL the time during work, I found a bad ass recipe for a RAW BROWNIE w/ 5 ingredients. Fucking AWESOME.

The Raw Brownie
Ingredients:
2 cups whole walnuts
2 ½ cups Medjool dates, pitted
1 cup raw cacao
1 cup raw unsalted almonds, roughly chopped
¼ tsp. sea salt

Directions:
1. Place walnuts in food processor and blend on high until the nuts are finely ground.
2. Add the cacao and salt. Pulse to combine.
3. Add the dates one at a time through the feed tube of the food processor while it is running. What you should end up with is a mix that appears rather like cake crumbs, but that when pressed, will easily stick together (if the mixture does not hold together well, add more dates).
4. In a large bowl (or the pan you plan on putting the brownies in), combine the walnut-cacao mix with the chopped almonds. Press into a lined cake pan or mold. Place in freezer or fridge until ready to serve (it is also easier to cut these when they are very cold). Store in an airtight container.

My New Roots

I can NOT wait to try this ❤

2pm I FINALLY ATE! I was on a conference call for 2 hours, trying to set these credit card terminals up. One would work the other wouldn’t.. I then had to do one 4 times over entering ZD&YQ7&YF% lol over and over, pressing enter.. fuck.. then I had to go pick up a car 30 min away.. then go to my bank to pull money out (dont know where the fuck my debit cards are again…..), then headed to whole foods. LOL. I am so bad :/

Blackened Chicken Breast and Zucchini AND half of a lara bar (:)

Holy shit still haven’t studied.

Did I mention I work next to a huge bread factory?

Do you know how good fresh bread smells?

F
M
L

It’s 9:22pm. I wasn’t even going to finish this blog tonight because I am so unhappy.

  1. I totally failed my test
  2. I exceeded my calorie intact

Fuck #1 I don’t even care. It was bogus but what the fuck with #2 really????

I ate myself retarded in peanut butter and had some tuna then later I went down to eat cranberries. I just didn’t want to stop.  WAIT OMG! AND I HAD SWEET POTATOES TOO! It wasn’t really anything it was more so I was bored, and maybe SLIGHTLY FUCKING PISSED. I’m not completely upset where I’d ruin everything I worked for but I am not happy with myself AND I came home early enough to work out and I didn’t.

So I am going to bed, otherwise I will just keep eating. 😦

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