Tag Archives: smile

Day 93- 3 days left..

Wednesday, May 9th…

Woke up fat. No joke.

NO idea where my abs went. Possibly the more carbs I had yesterday due to a leg workout? UGH.

so guess what I did, I googled that shit.

Found the same shit I already knew, drink more water, sweat ext ext.. Did see something about preparation- H.. so I got it. Lmao. I am so bad. Do not follow what I do just yet.. the point of the cream is to apply it prior or cardio so it secretes the fluid out of that area…… *CROSSES FINGERS* *PRAYS* *BLOWS OUT A CANDLE* pleassssssssseeeeeeeeeee work..

I’ve had enough. 3 days. I can do this.

All I want is to finish this contest prep.. EAT like crap for 24 hours, then get back to my normal lifestyle. I want to eat fruit without guilt. I want to EAT TO GROW AND I WANT IT NOW!!!!!! I know I’ll lose my abs for a few days but I don’t care. You should see me at the gym late at night.. I am practically SLEEPING!!! I am trying so hard, then I beat myself up over the fact that it was possibly a shitty fucking workout. I need balance in my life. Balance and forgiveness, especially for oneself.

Alright so yesterday after my never ending work day I headed over to Taylor’s Salon after I walked Marley and ate really quick.. (@La Flavia Salon in IL).. I waited around for a bit, for her to finish with her last client then I was next! She ended up cutting about 4 inches off.. dry cut and everything. It. Looks. Awesome. Anyways after we were chit chatting.. she thought she was going to dye it as well.. well obviously a miscommunication.. haha.. so I am going back tomorrow (Thursday) for her to dye it and style it (just so I know what it looks like and if I want it up or down).. so yes.. any who.. after the haircut we went back to her house and she got ready and we hit the gym.

It was leg day.. the last leg day of this contest prep.  yep. and let me tell you I, my “rest” breaks were me shutting my eyes and trying to sleep. It was awful. The only bright side of this story is I lifted my heaviest.. weird? haha.. no joke.

Blah blah blah got home at 1130pm and passed the fuck out.

I did book the hotel, so that’s another thing off my list of things to do. Now its just a waiting game really lol. Playing around with my poses and how my “abs” look in certain poses.. I am def ready to get all pampered though. Taylor is going to do an amazing job I already know.. now if my body was up to par…..

UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! Don’t worry.. I’ll be confident up there because you really don’t have any other choice lmfao.. but deep down I could of done better. I just have to remind myself that I didn’t do this with the intention of trying to out beat every girl.. this was a personal goal.  Really just a set date that I needed to lose that god awful weight in and I think I at least accomplished that. Again.. just WAIT for the before and after pics.. I at least lost 25 SOLID POUNDS OF FAT. Ugh I was disgusting.

Alright that was my little update for you and again I apologize for the lack material in my blogs.. I PROMISEEEEE as soon as I get SOME energy I will put A LOT of effort into making this blog something special. I LOVE receiving the comments/feed back from you guys. It ALWAYS puts me in a better mood/ a smile on my face. So I thank you.

now, to leave you with a photo that have made my jaw drop today..

..talk about  motivation.

Now go work out! 😉

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Day 74 Finally I found the Black Bean Brownie Recipe :)

Cravings have gone down. Cept I want cheese fries so bad. Cheese ingeneral now.. Isn’t that weird? I use to HATE cheese… and as long as its melted.. I can pretty  much eat it all 🙂 So weird… But anyways cheese fries are a whole nother story. They are awesome. Even better? Hooters Tatertots.. They are the potatoes that you use to get at lunch with that nasty excuse for a hamburger (I’ll show you my kind of hamburger lol), but these tots are loaded with nacho cheese, that green onion shit that’s amazing, sour cream and bacon. Holy fuck. Awesome. Everything about it. So. fucking. good.

Sorry.. I am trying to stop.. really.. lol..

On a better note I COME WITH A BROWNIE RECIPEEEE!!! And I am posting it because its healthy, they are made out of beans, and I need to cut these nasty cravings for this evil thing we call sugar. I still have a little less then 3 weeks so no I won’t be making these any time soon but I lost it and NOW I FOUND IT AGAIN!!!! So here it is.. super stoked.

Vegan Black Bean Brownie Recipe

For the Mix:

black bean brownie ingredients photo 300x200

1 1/2 cups whole wheat flour
1 tsp salt
1 tsp baking powder
2 1/4 cups raw sugar
1 1/4 cup cocoa
4 tsp instant coffee powder
1 1/2 cups chopped hazelnutsYou also need:
1 15 oz can black beans, rinsed and filled with new water
1 tsp vanilla
1 cup of water (eyeball it by filling up half the empty can)

Preheat the oven to 350 degrees.

Mix together the flour with the salt and baking powder.  For a nice layered presentation in a jar start with half the sugar,  then add half the flour mixture, all the cocoa, the coffee powder, the remaining flour, the remaining sugar, and the nuts on top.  When ready to bake, dump out the jar into a mixing bowl and stir to combine all the dry ingredients.

Drain a can of black beans and rinse thoroughly until the water runs clear.  Return the black beans back to the can and fill with water.  Puree the beans and water.  Add the puree to the dry mix along with the vanilla and extra cup of water.  Stir to combine.

Pour the batter into a greased 9×13 pan.  Bake for 25-30 minutes, rotating the pan around halfway through.  When the brownies are finished they should be firm in the center and the edges will be slightly puffy and starting to pull away from the sides.  My batch was finished at 28 minutes.  It’s important not to over bake in the oven because they will keep baking once you take them out.

Let brownies cool completely then use a 2×2 in cookie cutter to cut into 24 squares.

black bean brownies photo 1024x682

The Food Log

730am Protein Shake
1130am Chicken Breast w/ Mustard
230pm Chicken Breast w/ Asparagus and Mustard lol.
545pm My new found love rice cakes w/ Walden Farms Caramel Topping w/ Spinach and Turkey
9pm Eggs and another rice cake and topping. SO FUCKING GOOD I DON’T KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH MYSELF!

The Workout

6am 45min Cardio (Stairmaster)
730pm Back and Cardio 🙂

I don’t have much time to fill this in, so I will when I get home I just needed to post it.

Started with Lat Pulldown 5 sets up too 100lbs

then unilateral row, seated row, back ext, planks

+ 30 SOLID (no rest, High intensity) minutes of cardio.

Day 74 in Pictures..

ok fine. no more.

  1. My pickle. Everyone went to Potbelly 😦
  2. My pre workout meal. lol I WAS CRAVING SPINACH WTF?!
  3. Found the new love of my life. Sugar Free Rice cake w/ cinnamon and Walden Farms no calorie Caramel spread. HOLY HELL. It tastes like a pancake, to cinnamon toast crunch cereal, to french toast, back to apple I don’t know, but its awesome.
  4. Post workout- 3 eggs 1 egg white w/ Garlic and another amazingness in my mouth.

Today has been good except all the cravings (no I will NOT binge, or eat any of this. If I did it would be after my show lol).. but I did morning cardio, and did a semi decent back work out, but killed late night cardio. I need to start adding more time and taking away certain things.. I am almost 2 weeks out and at that point I will need to cut most fat ALL sugar and majority carbs. I wont be able to have artificial sweetener either lol. Ugh. SO not happy. lolol My suit should be here within the next week. I also ordered tattoo make up (really just for a large birthmark) and figured out my tan and my makeup. I randomly got a message and she wanted to trade (personal training for hair/ tans) HOW FUCKING AWESOME!!! My tanning last year cost $100!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and I did my make up and trust me you could tell. haha anyways.. hopefully now all I need to focus is losing fat but keeping my ass.. ahhhhhh YEAH!!! :):) Gotta keep this mentality going!

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Day 32 Without your mind’s support, your body won’t be able to make its transformation.

Not much going on today.. I don’t feel very “rantful” or opinionated today.. I also don’t feel that bad today lol.. Even after spending about 5 min starring at my stomach. lmfao. I look horrible. That and because I AS WHITE AS F U C K. but I was thinking about it today when I was walking my bosses dog that whenever my clients ask about ab work outs and what they want to look better the most ext..
..and I always tell them, you lose weight like a box, so the outside first.. (its hard to visualize), but your abs are the last to come in.. sorry kiddos!

which is true.. and even more so about this quote. If your mind is NOT ready, either are you. You have to WANT to change. You have to WANT a better lifestyle. KNOW that you can achieve this. It is all mind over matter. && BE PATIENT (i am SLLLLLLLLLOOOOWWLYYYYY learning this even after 5 years of a fitness lifestyle!!!!!!!!)

My legs are def getting defined and my shoulders are starting to round.
I am also losing the water weight/ the cellulite under my HUGE ASS!…. I will post pics after I spray tan this weekend, that get my nails done and dye my hair.

Can you believe I WENT 30 DAYS WITH NO SPRAY TAN OR FAKE NAILS! hahahahaha 😦 told you I was broke. damn imac. 2000 later……………………………………
I have a good warranty though.. LOL.

8am finished my protein shake already. it was just so good.

Having stomach problems again today. Before I thought it was because of an orange, but I didn’t have any today. Then I realized I am having ALOT of fiber/flax. LMFAO.  So I  have to be careful.

1030 Handful of Almonds

1122am On vitacost.com and I feel like I’m buying a new louis bag or something. I am getting anything my little heart desires. Like thoseeeeeee…….. GO RAW SUPERCOOKIES! haha..  I could go just down the street, but free shipping and I think they are a dollar less.. I don’t see all the flavors, nor do I have a website to go to.. So far I have lemon chocolate ginger snap original and I think spicy. superfuckingexcited.

Only spent about $40 🙂 so kinda happy. BUT I do have to buy myofusion and more aminos.. so that’s another 50-60$

😦

12pm Ate my chicken breast. Still hungry. Gonna munch on some edamame and keep surfing the internet lol.

Lifting Shoulders today though, with 30 min cardio. Kinda excited. I do love shoulders 🙂

210pm I just want to get out of here.

258pm Eating another chicken breast in about 30 min, still snacking on edamame and I only had like 5 of the raw lemon cookies.

So just an UPDATE:

Made another blog.. by popular demand. Bad Bitch of the Day. Where I post who I think is just RAVISHING! hahaha.. It’s anywhere from fitness models or personal friends ext. It is a big hit on my Facebook and someone mentioned to make a blog, okay they mentioned it more then once but 2 BLOGS???? one is hard enough!
However I don’t think BBOTD will need a lot of attention. Just daily updated pics, MAYBE bios ext. I don’t know.. I don’t know if I even should get in this mess lol.. but I’ll give it a shot.

608pm Just got home, gonna take Marley for a walk.. Sitting here writing I am getting a little bit tired.. not a good sign.. I think I may eat a meal before working out, or just lightly “snack”.. Idk I feel like I have been enjoying my fruits way to much (BUT I HAVENT HAD A LARA BAR IN A DAY OR TWO!!! haha usually I have one everyday, maybe even twice a day!) but it’s because I found cooler stuff to munch on..

So in about a week or 2 I am going to start cutting back on a few things (fruits, lara bars ext) not extremely but I do have to step it up a bit. Fruit may just be only in the am ( I find myself snacking on fruit later on in the day, which isn’t nec a bad thing because I work out at night), however, that and I need to add 15 min to my cardio sessions. 🙂

This is what I spent time on in class yesterday. =)

GETTTTTING CLOOOOOSERRRRRRRR !!! ❤ I am going to start posting bikini ideas, hopefully whoever gets this far down and reads this, leave a comment about which bikini you like.. I have like 58378932 ideas 🙂 I really wanted to do a pink this comp, but maybe a gold or a black (black always looks good!).

Anyone try these??

I wonder how good they are.. And little miss april I thought of you 🙂 but then again, I see myself eating these flax “cookies” and I could eat the whole bag. Regardless they only have like 300-400 MAX calories but still I am still learning how to listen to my body.

I am slowly figuring out where I get my stomach aches from.. I have to start writing this shit down.. because like the orange for instance, I ate it and RIGHT away (the acid i know…) KILLED my stomach.. But it only lasted like 30 min… which I think is a fine compromise to keep oranges in my life 🙂

BOULDER SHOULDERS!!!!!

Seated DB shoulder press

Lateral Raises/ supersetted with Front Raises

I am going to throw in some chest here too..

Incline chest press

Flyes

Upright row

Seated chest press

These are pictures I took today lol..
Above: In between chest press
Below: After I got home =D

942pm Just had a protein shake with chia seeds, pb2 powder and ice… I just chugged it.. didn’t taste that great.. I really REALLY need myofusion. and I am running low on aminos.. I might get them tomorrow.. who knows..

alright this blogging day is about done..OH

and I keep getting requests for personal training which is AWESOME! I charge $50 a session, and usually DONT travel, and sure as HELL don’t do it in peoples houses. I think I should just buy a huge like SUV with like cables kettle bells and other moveable workout shit and just like…… Idk travel and train lol.. I think I could make it my business.. All we would really did is like a stadium or any type of flight of stairs or a track or something ya know.. any who.. I should look into it.. I could even write my shit off for taxes because it would be my  job.. gas, my car lol ext..

HMMMMMMMMMM :):):):) Anywho.. in a good mood…. Gonna relax and hit the sack.. don’t have to be up till 9 tomorrow so I am going to take a long bubble bath 🙂

Okay so 1113pm I went and smoked with someone.. and you know what I Found out.. I am VERY opinionated.. I don’t talk badly about someone who doesn’t feel the same way, but I get so defensive. And its because I am passionate about the topic we are discussing.. Oh man……. I need to just breathe sometimes… I get so upset so quickly.. Like something I Didn’t mention before..

I was at bp completely on E and the pump I was on wasn’t working. I immediately started swearing.. I even thought to myself, why I was making a big deal of it.. I mean all i had to do was walk to the actual station.. whooopdeeedoo.. but then the cashier was rude as fuck and said just let it cancel out.. oh okay.. so whatever I see that it finally is at the screen I want I take the pump and put it in my tank and press the unleaded button.. ANNNNNNND NOTHING!. FUCK THAT> at that point I didn’t care I really just wanted to leave, but I practically threw the pump itself back into the holder, except it didn’t actually latch on, and I THOUGHT about leaving it,s at in the car looked out and swore even louder as I got out to put it back up (more so just making me look like an idiot), and then I reversed and shoved my credit card into the machine and it worked just fine…. All for $10 in gas because I was so pissed I didn’t wanna stand there…. then I got in the car drove off, 5 minutes later perfectly fine.

Oh.
Okay..

Goodnight ❤

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Day 30 My only wish is I die real.

HAD TO START WITH SAYING 2 MONTH CIGARETTE FREE!!!

But I feel like shit.

I felt like shit last night too, so woke up 15 min prior to  me needing to leave. Not like I give a shit, but Marley would NOT stop whinning at 6am. My mom had to come in and take her out, shes such a weirdo.

But back to me feeling like shit. It feels like acid reflux. Haven’t had it in AWHILE.. so it’s weird that its coming back now. FUCKKKK I took 3 tums last night and I woke up fine, now it hurts again.

Had a dope ass shake though.

830am W/ the nasty WF vanilla P. powder with fresh pineapple, frozen mango ice and water (oh and fiber). It was awessssssssssssssssome. I am going to add coconut oil tomorrow 🙂

Anywho its 1041am I found Raw almonds in a customers car LMFAO. I had to go in it to get the title and all of a sudden a bag of unopened almonds popped out. FUCKING PERFECT. I was starving and not only was my stomach hurting from WHATEVERTHEFUCKISGOINGON, i had hunger pains too. 😦 No bueno.

So I ate a handful of those then had a piece of pineapple. MMMMMM I LOVE FOOD!

NEED TO GO TO THE DMV today, but Matt isn’t here. I am seriously in so much trouble. :(:(

Bought another sweatshirt from LIFT BIG EAT BIG. The purple one. 🙂 I only bought one sweatshirt from their because I am rewarding myself. I haven’t gotten any check from school cathy or my tax return so this is my money rewarding myself for hitting day 30 🙂 But I want like 2 or 3 more things 🙂

&& I want these SO BADDDDDDD ❤

Anyways. I am in a really good fucking mood. the weather is FUCKING BEAUTIFUL!!!!!!!!!!! no joke its 68 degrees March 6. Take a few seconds and thank WHOEVER you think is in charge of life and death and thank them for another day here on earth.

Actually what if death is better then life? lol. Like once we die its like a never ending party. hahahaha justkidding. THANK YOU GOD FOR TODAY! ❤

I feel myself getting a little hungry (231pm) I have more pineapple that I shouldnt eat, actually I CAN, omg stomach pains again 😦 but I may go sneak some more almonds lmfao.. ITS LEG DAY TODAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!! Lets see some sexy legs!!!!!!!!!

So far doing legs 2x a week is going great. My ass is huge, and its staying that way, all while my legs (thighs ext) are thinning out. FUCK YEAH!..

See I’m positive about my body when I’m in a good mood, and think I’m pregnant when I’m not.
Writing things down does help…….

HOLY FUCKING SHIT

924pm Just an update

Left for work at 5pm. Got flicked off and tried to run off the road TWICE. I was taking a video of the first guy because he was acting crazy and as soon as I was about to hit off I said ” and I need to cut this guy off”.. but hoesntly THERE WAS ENOUGH DAMN ROOM. it wasn’t like a huge ordeal. Well I turned the record button off and continued driving. Well the road merges back onto the highway or follow with traffic. Well this guy got on the further road to go straight and wouldn’t let me in.. Pretty much he was running me off the road.. WEll I saw I had like 100 feet and sped up and I didn’t give a shit if he hit my car. He had a mercedes and I simply didn’t care. I wouldn’t of said anything, probably wouldn’t of even stopped had he hit me lol.. Anywho I got my camera back on and he started acting normal till he got on the right again (after fucking with me) and I slowed down and rolled down my window.. I wanna see if I can post the video here.. lol

Nevermind it won’t let me :(:( Hopefully I can figure it out sometime.. But he said, cut me off one more time bitch.. and he sounded so flustered like he knew he was on camera lol and didn’t know if he was going to roll down his window or not.. whatever hahaha.. I can’t believe it.. thats 3 times in 2 days..

So I got home I ate a piece of steak again at like 445 so I only ate a couple scoops of applesauce (just because lol) and part of a lara bar.. I had a lot of fruit today.

Got to the gym at 730pm

Squats!

60lbs x 10reps
80lbs x 10reps
90lbs x 8reps
100lbs x 6reps
110lbs x 4reps

Moved onto lunges. MHMMMMM started at 40 lb DB in each hand

80lbs x 100 MOTHER FUCKING LUNGES BABY!

My forearms wanted to give up more then my legs did. My legs were hurting at the last few reps.. like wobbly type shit. Then went over to the Leg Ext.. Even though I was going to do calves but I was kind of spacey.

65lbs x 12reps
80lbs x 10reps
95lbs x 10reps
110lbs x 8reps
125lbs x 8reps
140lbs x 6reps

FInished with 3 sets of 10 reps (45lbs) seated calf raises.

Did 2 set of planks. I was hurting. I did 10 box jumps though lol.. and I really didn’t feel anything jiggle up and down lol.. whichhhh is fanfuckingtastic.

🙂

Got a diet coke (yes I am taking full advantage before I can’t drink it anymore)… ate some stolen almonds. And then made a smoothie.. coconut mango pineapple… mmmmm so fucking good.

Probably all Im gonna eat.. I want to go to bed at a normal time..

I have been thinking about things… and I really need to stop getting so upset about things so fast. Everything can be solved. But first you just need to breathe. Honestly. ENJOY your life. Do something for YOU! Not only that find something you can hold on too.. That gives you faith.. that gives you hope… I really think people need to start living for  something.

Then I get to thinking about how people can’t even say thank you or bless you when someone sneezes. How people can’t even hold a door open for someone anymore, and I think people are going to just take a few seconds even to thank the universe for all I care, just to be alive.  Life is so precious and you really don’t know when its all going to end. but when it does I want to have at least help or have helped someone… anyone.. I want someone to have been changed by something I stood for or just said in general. I want little girls to know that they are beautiful. That the outside does NOT define who you are inside. That vanity is ignorance to the beauty thats around us. I want people to be happier.. just fucking stop hating each other.. why are you holding a grudge? why is everyone SO DAMN MAD ALL THE FUCKING TIME?!?!

The thing is is I always LOOK mad, completely different then actually being mad.. yes perspective is everything and everyone judges, but honestly I think in my life, I’ve been more sad then mad and I used being angry to cover up wanting to always cry. I mean fuck I’ve done my fair share of crying (and I could cry at just about anything lol). But I think I rather choose to scream and yell then to crying and hyperventilate.

I always knew anger was a second emotion but never put much thought into it. The thing is is I wasn’t mad at the world, or people around me.. I was just upset at my life and how I was living it. I was probably jealous and envious over certain peoples lifestyles, bodies, cars  (whatever the fuck it may be) but never truly upset with anyone.. Not even my dad who introduced himself to me on my 8th grade graduation.

Yeah my mom thinks I should be angry at him but honestly I don’t. He didn’t leave me, he never hated me.. Shit happens and people react in different ways. Hence what I am saying about myself. I choose to do stuff differently (judge people ext), and no one really told me I was ever wrong, Just like my father knows (hopefully) but thats it. As long as you learn a lesson from past mistakes I think in the end it will make you a better person. Though they say never to regret anything, well I don’t believe in that. I don’t mean sit there and dwell, but I don’t think regretting something is wrong. It doesn’t do much, but its not wrong. I think it would be wrong if you didn’t regret it (meaning you’d do it again).. Idk to each their own.. I just wish I didn’t have to hurt people to become what I think is a better person now.

Words hurt. Words stay in peoples minds. and I am so sorry to anyone that I have ever hurt.

and trust me, I have hurt people with the words I have said. I am not proud the fact that I can hurt someone so badly with just the words that come out of my mouth. and to think I WANTED to hurt someone with them…

I was just lost. lost and confused 😦

Shit this could go on forever but I am going to end it here.. its going on 10pm..

Point is.. I am a different person now. I do not judge anyone, because it is not my place to judge. Being open and having people being open with me, has made me realize that just because a person is smiling on the outside, that they are not living, going or been thru hell.

I have heard some fucked up stories, that I couldn’t even dream up if I wanted too, not to mention, would I have EVER of guessed that this person has been through, what they went thru.

Just please the next time you want to say something mean rude, hurtful disrepesetful ext.. know that not only do sticks and stones hurt…. so do words. and some people are going thru enough behind close doors, that they don’t need an ignorant jackass talking shit.

Sorry. Idk why that all came out.. 😦

Anyways I’m going to bed. Sorry to bore the fuck out of you.

Goodnight ❤

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Day 22 #healthygirlproblems

8am I have been broke all week because a small shopping spree, and me having to pay for school, so I have $21 till tomorrow morning.  I didn’t have food to take to work this morning (I got lazy so its my own fault), and just so happens my gas light turned on.. well since I didn’t want to ask my mom or take money out of my savings, I decided to put $5 in my gas tank and leave the rest for my blackened chicken breasts from Whole Foods. I guess I’ll figure out how to get home later 😉

#healthygirlproblems.

830am Myofusion Protein Shake LIKE USUAL.

9am Learn that 4 students were shot at an Ohio High School. Please pray for a safe recovery.

The reason I am so tired this morning is because I stayed up late having “deep” (lol) conversations with someone, and this topic was brought up. About how people are inhumane. How people could look so “normal” on the outside and be so morally corrupted inside. I was never always a good girl, but I couldn’t DREAM up some of this stuff that people do (killing animals, brutal murders, ext). It’s just so unbelievable that people could honestly do some of the things that go on in this world.
905am I prayed for the first time in awhile. It felt so good.
1015am I am hungry. Drinking tea and a diet coke. Will eat a lara bar in about 30 min or so.
1207pm Super hungry. Had a PB Chocolate Chip Lara bar. It was actually pretty good, but I got to be careful of the ones with the CC’s bc they have sugar in it (not sure if its natural). Gonna head to Whole Foods again for my chicken breast.
Is it weird that I am super excited to get off work everyday and work out? Lol
I was so spoiled before when I was a personal trainer. I got to work out whenever I had free time. I was literally at the gym from 6am to 8pm (sometimes 10pm depending where I was with training for the competition). But no joke, it wasn’t even like going to work. I LOVED my clients (for the most part haha) and enjoyed going to work everyday for the WHOLE day. One day though, one day I’ll be back. I had a little taste of what I want to do for the rest of my life, and now I’m just creating a path, something I can be excited about and PROUD OF. Something I can feel like I accomplished by myself (I’m still trying to see my strengths and what I’m “good at”). I do know that I will be in the fitness industry or something pertaining to it for the rest of my life. I don’t see myself not caring about my body, or helping others feel good about themselves. I know one day I am going to finally feel like I “used everything God gave me.”
Actually that’s a really good quote, I’m googling it:

“When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, “I used everything you gave me.”

SO powerful <3.

1pm I went to whole foods, and got 2 blackened chicken breasts. Honestly every time I go into Whole foods I get excited.. More #healthygirlproblems? LOL. Btw I googled to see if I could make a website or something, but some girl already has it AND IS NOT GIVING IT ITS FULL POTENTIAL! I wonder if I could like…. buy it off her.. I think its a great freakin idea.  Not to mention my “facebook friends” have said they want a Bad Boy of the Day, as well as Bad Bitch of the Day// lol I thought that was kind of funny. I just don’t know how it would all work.. Ill think about it.

So anyways I left Whole Foods only $9.57 later. CHEAPEST TRIP TO WHOLE FOODS EVER!! and I ate one of my chicken breasts in the car. Is that weird? actually I really am weird.

230pm and I’m eating Justin’s Chocolate Almond Butter packet (180 cals), stomach is already growling.

Not sure what I want to do today in the gym. I just did legs on Saturday so I’m waiting till tomorrow to do those again. My arms , more specifically my tri’s, hurt like a bitch. Which is great, because my arms NEVER are sore the next day. I also think my arms are the weakest part of my body. I would LOVE nice defined arms. ❤ ❤

SO fucking sexy.

Btw forgot to take a progress pic. Don’t mind though, I’m really more worried about 9 weeks and later (9 weeks is usually where most people start dieting, depending on their off season).
5pm Ate 1/2 of the other chicken breast IN MY CAR, like the first one.. Seriously here I am banging my dub step with a huge chicken breast in my hand. Just IMAGINE IT!
630pm Ate the other 1/2 of the chicken breast, 1/2 of a lemon lara bar, a cutie (orange thing), and the last 2 PB&J squares.
8pm Finally got to the gym! Super excited about working out. I have no idea but I honestly feel like a whole new person. Ive stopped letting people get to me. Ive stayed positive when life takes its turns, and overall I just live life with out fear. And thats something that I could NOT say a few years ago, probably even a month ago.

I am F E A R L E S S !

So I hit the gym with probably one of the best attitudes that I have had in a LONG time. I first hit Assited pull ups (can’t wait to do these on my own, superfuckingexcited). I then went to a unilateral row (went pretty heavy here). Follwed by a super set consisting of a Wide grip row and a pullover. Then ended with some machine I actually have no idea what it is called (went heavy here too). I finished up with 5 minutes of planks and 20 minutes of the stair master. I feel fucking AWESOME!

930pm Came home and made a protein shake (myofusion banana and pb2 ice water) tastes great 🙂 Finishing up the blogs, updates, emails, and then gonna call this one an early one. Sorry today was kind of boring.. Not much going on. 😉

My lift big eat big sweatshirt ❤ 

And for some reason I look super skinny. Idk why..  
Def excited about this change though. It’s only gonna get better from here on out. Have faith, and everything else seems easy.

Goodnight ❤ 

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