Tag Archives: Squat

Project Clean Up!

I finally decided to sit down and write. I don’t know what I am going to write, but I have a crap ton of photos, that will help in describing my life in the last couple of weeks.

Things have been hectic to say the least.. Studying for NASM, going through transitions at work and at home, and just trying to stay on the road I think is best. Its been hard, and I am not afraid or ashamed to say, that even though hesitant at first, I think its best if I talk to someone professionally. I have too many outside biased opinions that I feel cloud my mind at times. I want to sit down and explain myself and figure out if I really am crazy.. Okay a little dramatic, but I do feel it sometimes.

The one thing that is getting me by, is the group of friends I’ve previously mentioned. Having such a tight-knit group is something I can’t explain. I guess I have never experienced this kind of true friendship. Its awesome.. that’s just put it that way.. Not to forget that I have learned SO much.. more than I have in the last 4 years trying to get by on my own. 6 months with these people and I feel like a new and improved person. They make me feel good.. at all times.. I think that’s so important during the stressful times of contest prep, or just simply living the life of someone who works at a gym.. someone who takes it seriously (yes I have to put a disclaimer.. I see your sales guys eating McDonald’s over there)… such a shame.

Any who.. enough lovey dovey shit.. I have been eating like crap for the last week. Burgers.. upon burgers.. ice cream, frozen yogurt, McDonald’s.. You name it, I probably had it. This is a great way to start loading pictures, dont cha think ;P

@SMOKE bbq

@SMOKE bbq

Idk why that last picture is blurry but not like we needed it anyways. We DEMOLISHED our food @bulldogs in grayslake. I had the mac daddy. This was last night... haha. ANDDDD.. not pictured but same night, the boy came over and we got Mcflurrys. The next time you get one, ask for hot fudge (with the oreo of course). You will not be sorry!

Idk why that last picture is blurry but not like we needed it anyways. We DEMOLISHED our food @bulldogs in grayslake. I had the mac daddy. This was last night… haha. ANDDDD.. not pictured but same night, the boy came over and we got Mcflurrys. The next time you get one, ask for hot fudge (with the oreo of course). You will not be sorry!

The only reason, I am randomly adding this progress picture in, is because this was the morning before the night of the burgers (above pictured). I have literally eaten like crap, and this is how I woke up, after alllllllll the food about to be pictured...

The only reason, I am randomly adding this progress picture in, is because this was the morning before the night of the burgers (above pictured). I have literally eaten like crap, and this is how I woke up, after alllllllll the food about to be pictured…

Sushi @Dragonfly in Chicago. We LOVE this place. So amazing. We also had orange steak and prok fried rice. We. get. down.

Sushi @Dragonfly in Chicago. We LOVE this place. So amazing. We also had orange steak and pork fried rice. We. get. down.

Night of dragonfly, clearly loving life.

Night of dragonfly, clearly loving life.

I suppose I should of started with this pic, but the whole reason we were downtown and had sushi was because I had to take a 3 hour CPR class that I was almost late too because of chicago traffic during any type of weather change... BUTTTTTTTT I passed! Notice the isopure ;)

I suppose I should have started with this pic, but the whole reason we were downtown and had sushi was because I had to take a 3 hour CPR class that I was almost late too because of chicago traffic during any type of weather change… BUTTTTTTTT I passed! Notice the isopure 😉

Post sushi. :O The boy snap chatted me this picture lol. I swear the options were endless!!!!!

Post sushi. :O The boy snap chatted me this picture lol. I swear the options were endless!!!!!

@Coldstone. I never skimp on the deliciousness here. The boy always gets a smoothie or some weird thing.. Here I believe I actually got one of their premade options. It was oreo hot fudge and chocolate chips... sweet cream icecream... mmmmmmmm

@Coldstone. I never skimp on the deliciousness here. The boy always gets a smoothie or some weird thing.. Here I believe I actually got one of their premade options. It was oreo hot fudge and chocolate chips… sweet cream icecream… mmmmmmmm

I obviously had a few bites of his icecream but get this... icecream 2.99 my apple?????? 3.09!!!!!!!!!!!!! But they were on sale for 2.99 meaning my apple was a little over a lb! lmao..

I obviously had a few bites of his icecream but get this… icecream 2.99 my apple?????? 3.09!!!!!!!!!!!!! But they were on sale for 2.99 meaning my apple was a little over a lb! lmao..

@fiveguys. Bacon Burger....... Cajun fries..... I was in heaven.

@fiveguys. Bacon Burger……. Cajun fries….. I was in heaven.

This was about 2-3 days into crapping eating but still lifting like a badass. No cardio. Night AFTER sushi.. (above).

This was about 2-3 days into crapping eating but still lifting like a badass. No cardio. Night AFTER sushi.. (above).

Leg progress. Super happy with them lately.

Leg progress. Super happy with them lately.

soooo cold out! random selfie ;P

soooo cold out! random selfie ;P

My new bag LOVE, new aminos LOVE and my resistance bands for pull ups!!!!!

My new bag LOVE, new aminos LOVE and my resistance bands for pull ups!!!!!

10oz ribeye @outback. SOOOOOOOOO good. you have the option for grilled or pan with seasoned. I asked for it to be seasoned but grilled and it could not have been better. Funny story or not story but fact, this but his steak and an appetizer cost the same as when we go to Buffalo Wild Wings. Isnt that nuts?!

10oz ribeye @outback. SOOOOOOOOO good. you have the option for grilled or pan with seasoned. I asked for it to be seasoned but grilled and it could not have been better. Funny story or not story but fact, this but his steak and an appetizer cost the same as when we go to Buffalo Wild Wings. Isnt that nuts?!

Beginning of the year 2014'

Beginning of the year 2014′

So, as you may know I am an avid believer in eating clean. However, I don’t know exactly what went on here. I didn’t calorie count or track anything (besides the pictures), but you can tell I wasn’t shy about those calories consumed. I enjoyed every last bite of every meal I ate in the last week. That I get, but what confuses me is that I didn’t change my work out regimen  to adapt to the significantly higher calories in my diet, but I still maintained if not IMPROVED my physique. Yes I am not stage lean-to ANY extent, but I feel like I have actually never looked better. Maybe they really were magic cookies…

Haha inside joke.. I have started a cookie binge and it’s catching on like a virus! I swear they’re not magic! This is not a trend, do NOT follow! haha… I think my body was just going crazy and even it didn’t know what to do with itself..BUT today, I have started from scratch. Chicken and veggies for meeeeeeeee. Lets see what happens.. I mean,, if crap food and no added exercise made me look like this.. I can only imagined if I cleaned things up!

Back to some good read though. I deadlifted 225 no problem. No straps.. just chalk. About 4 months ago, I attempted this. I stood by the bar and couldn’t budge it. I strapped up, had a spot and maybe hit 3 reps. Just the other day, after about 6 reps of continuously adding weight, we threw on 225 just for shits and giggles. Chalked up and repped it out. Literally. It was nuts. So nuts, that I feel that I may have been spotted the whole time. She says all she did was bring my shoulders back but maybe that’s what it took to get it up?? So.. after were all recovered, I want to try it again.. no spot.. no bullshit. Until then… I spotted 225 😉

….and the best part of my last couple of weeks?

Just so happened to happen about 2 days ago. I was training a client that I have had ever since i made the switch to Waukegan. He was coming in 2 times a week in the morning with another trainer. That trainer changed his schedule and could no longer train him. I met with him, at which point he couldnt go up or down the stairs without holding on due to a bad motorcycle accident. As far as I was told, when he first started with the gym he was had a cane (previously in wheelchair for weeks). Weight loss had always been a goal, but we really needed to focus on reworking the muscles for basic human movements. starting from scratch, we needed to work on our foundation. Slowly but surely all the progress was really made on the scale. Eventually a couple of months in, he was super happy about going up and down the stairs no problem. He literally hustled! It was awesome. Another time he came in and asked to give me a hug. Later explained hunting was no longer painful, No longer took an ATV out, instead walks to where he sets up shop. But what was major BADASS (and I am so sorry I don’t have a video. You can check out Phitness Aesthetics on Facebook or my Instagram, Maristheshit), was when we took me to our little room and said he needed to show me something. I already knew I wanted to video tape it so you hear him saying I’m going to make fun of him! He first walks up and down on both legs over a few step ups. I’m super happy already but again you hear him say, but that isn’t even the best part. YOU SEE THE EXCITEMENT ON HIS FACE, as he attempts to BOX JUMP IT!!! AND HE DOES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! A couple of times too!!!!!! It was so amazing. I showed it to my co worker who previously trained him and he said he had tears in his eyes, if not everyone who saw it. People were amazed and they didn’t even know it. Ugh! You have to see the video now.. I’ll try to upload it..

Shit it really wont let me.

View this post on Instagram

Meet Doug. He was one of my first clients when I made the move to Waukegan (6months ago). He could barely walk up the stairs without holding on to something (due to a bad motorcycle accident), so you could tell how much of an improvement since then by his excitement in the first part of the video. Little did I know, that wasn't even the half of it. He BOX JUMPED THAT SHIT!!!!!!! I was speechless. When it comes to #fitness, people assume it's all about #weightloss. Now, if done properly (and with a well balanced #nutrition), weight loss should occur… But sometimes our focus should be more on learning (or relearning) basic human movements and correcting any imbalances that may have occurred (during injury or constant bad form ext). A huge thanks to @phitness_aesthetics and the wide range of knowledge this team possesses.

A post shared by Marissa 💋 (@maristheshit) on

See if that will work.. If Not.. just google maristheshit or find me on instagram. Any who.. I’m just going to leave on that note.. It was just too awesome not too!

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Highlights!

Highlights of my week (since I fell off the radar. Imagine that):

Thursday:

Leg Day and holy hell was it crazy.
300 squats. Yes, 3 0 0.
50 @ 45lbs
40 @ 65lbs
30 @ 85lbs
20 @ 105lbs
10 @ 125lbs
10 @125lbs
20 @ 105lbs.. ext you get the picture. All the way back up to 50 reps.

It took us a little over an hour to complete. I was exhausted.

-1

I have been tracking my food intake for the last couple days. I have been staying around 2000 calories but haven’t been paying attention to my carbs/protein as much. Starting this week (tomorrow), I will get more detailed about it.

2051 calories
244g carbs
191g protein
36g fat

With 1196 calories burned via exercise.

Friday:

Didn’t have too busy of a day. Most of my clients cancelled. I really didn’t do a full work out either. I attempted to do a little upper body but mentally was just not there. The calories burned (286) were from taking Marley to the park. I did some lunges and a sort little exercise. I didn’t count (or track via my heart rate monitor) the sad excuse for an upper body work out I did before I had my first client. So, nothing too interesting. Nor anything to “highlight”.

1814 calories
185g car
196g protein
42g fat

286 calories burned via exercise.

Saturday:

Woke up pretty early for my first client around 8am. I had one more before I did a spin class at 9am. This is basically my only form of cardio right now. So yes, not as lean as I would like but I am not going to do what I did last contest prep and over due cardio to try to speed up the process.

Here is a picture I took Saturday:

-2

Sitting at 150lbs still. Not losing any weight, but I am not really trying to. Again. have been eating around 2000 calories and only about an hour of cardio. It is very important that the next 15 weeks, that I stay positive and in the day. Last prep, I did too  much cardio and lost my ass in fear that my abs wouldn’t show. For anyone doing a competition (actually, for any one starting a new fitness regimen) DO NOT FIGHT THE PROCESS!! Of course we all want to be lean and some of us would like to look “shredded”. It WILL come. Just be patient. I have a lot of room to play around with via my food intake and adding more cardio. You have to understand the basics before you start starving yourself to lose the weight. What ends up happening is you mess up your metabolism and will gain the weight right back. It is a vicious cycle. Do some research, or hire someone to do it for you and take each day as it comes. I promise you that it will be worth it. Ended my work day around 1:30pm.

On my way to the boys house!

On my way to the boys house!

I got home around 2 and took a shower before I headed to the boyfriend’s house. Actually, I took a shower and slept for an hour before I headed to the boyfriend’s house. He had a big party to go to that I was actually quite anxious about going too. I am not a big drinker (actually when I do drink, I don’t get drunk. So Please don’t pass the bottle, pass a motherfucking cupcake. Way worth the calories than)! I actually don’t like the whole partying lifestyle and quite frankly, just not my thing. So, that being said it was hard to see him enjoying his liquor as much as he was. I am however, not his mother and although I spoke my mind, I felt like I had no right. I want him to have fun.. but I don’t trust a lot about that lifestyle. Acting way different drunk than sober. Getting loud and acting like his friends but after a few talks with a new client of mine, and his and I’s tispy talk, I am no longer going to worry (yes, WAY easier said then done) about our relationship. I feel like I have finally found a happy medium and will continue to stay positive and pray. I don’t know. But before I choke on my words, It wasn’t that bad. Granted it was supposed to be WAY bigger than it was, I didn’t have as bad of a time as I thought I would sober. Just sat there drinking my water 🙂 and eating of course. Though, not everything I wanted. There was 3 different cakes, and dips and great freakin stuff! But I held my own and my lovely boyfriend fed me meat all night. I added in my calories (although I guessed) and it came out to be like 700 calories worth of meat. Def don’t think that’s legit but whatever 🙂 Still met my goal.

Well.. only because by the time I took 3 bites of his oreo cake (WHICH BTW WAS AMAZING), it was passed midnight. So I added the 150 calories of cake to the next day.

1990 Calories
158g carbs
133g protein
89g fat

317 calories burned via spin class.

Sunday Funday:

We didn’t get home till around 4am after making a pit stop at a secret fishing spot (he caught 2 bass pretty quickly and randomly) and at his buddies house. We slept in till around 12:30 ( I know!! :/) haha and headed downtown Chicago for some sushi. Knowing this, I was a little sad because it is my favorite sushi place and I really wanted to stay on my 4 week no cheat challenge. But when we got there, the owner who is one of our good friends picked out a dish that wasn’t on the menu and ordered it for me. It was basically chicken and veggies with brown rice (sauce on the side, though I just used soy sauce). I was super happy! And to think I thought all I would have would be edamame. Blah! After that, we drove home. He felt bloated (per usual) and I felt fine. It’s a whole different story when you don’t eat till you’re full. It almost feels good. Not to forget, that by 6pm I still had my abs. Hell yes! All thanks to a little challenge I created for myself. Only 10 days though!! Just 10 days and I can enjoy a full on cheat meal! So glad its my birthday too. It will be a double whammie!! yes.. I just said whammie.

 

Dragonfly in Chicago!

Dragonfly in Chicago!

We laid in bed for a bit, while the food digested. Took the dog for a walk and I left shortly after. I have to be up at 5am tomorrow and well.. it never gets any easier. Tomorrow is definitely going to be a long day, but I guess it is what it is. Hopefully have a nice little upper body work out!

1795 calories (although I MAY eat another meal. I’m not sure).
167g carbs
86g protein (fail)
57g fat

0 exercise. My lovely day off!

Time to snooze!

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Tearing $%#@ UP!

Alright, I am obviously not going to be able to write everyday on this thing. Mostly because I am always tired, but more so because my life isn’t that interesting.

C doing her second set of squats. SQUEEZING her glutes!

C doing her second set of squats. SQUEEZING her glutes!

Any who, yesterday I had a kick ass leg work out. I worked out with H and C and tore shit up (at the end.. I thought I tore shit, literally). We started with squats. It went a little like this:

15 warm up squats with just the bar
30 x 95lbs
20 x 135lbs
10 x 165lbs
20 x 135lbs
30 x 95lbs

Each set, we super setted with dead lifts (around 15-20 reps) @ 60lbs. The last 2 sets with 80lbs.

This took an hour and I thought I was going to cry. I was going to tap out, but decided to finish with some leg presses. I did 2 sets of 60 reps with 140lbs. However, I had to take a break in between rep 25 lol. Now.. After THIS I thought I was game over but the dude that came half way in between our squatting session, and I made a unanimous decision we were no longer doing compound exercises. So we opted for leg curl and calf raise. I did ONE set of each and couldn’t physically do anymore. I walked, like a new-born calf, to our pt corner and immediately rolled out my legs using a foam roller. I was going to cry. It felt like I had torn my hamstrings and I was NOT liking this feeling. A few minutes into rolling, I felt fine. I think this helped tremendously and will be more consistent with that little devil.

Post leg day, went to hipotle.

Double steak FTW!

Double steak FTW!

Today, I was fine. I got up and trained from 6-8:30am and wasnt as sore as I thought I would be (tomorrow might be a different story). I had a quest bar on the way to work around 5:45am, and when I came home ate a huge bowl of oatmeal. I usually don’t like oatmeal, but I have been putting tons of fruit in it to make it.. actually quite good.

-1

Here, I have strawberries, blueberries and a handful of kashi go lean crunch cereal. This is my second day in a row having oatmeal. Imagine that.

Afterwards, I took a nap and decided to skip my upper body work out. I needed rest. My body is taking a beating and regardless of how lean I want to look, I (and YOU) NEED to listen you your body. When its hungry, hurting, tired. LISTEN TO IT!!!!! I slept till around 11am, and got up to eat some brown rice, broccoli and chicken.

Around 1pm, I took Marley to the park and did a little work out. In around 35 minutes of doing, bench jumps (like box jumps, just.. well on a bench), push ups, lunges and single leg squats, I burned 185 calories (40% from fat).

3:30pm – 8pm Trained clients.

In between, I had 1/2c greek yogurt with a handful of blueberries and a plain chicken breast with mustard. HA!

8:30pm Did some cardio. 8.0 incline (on the treadmill because the stairmaster was taken by 3 people who clearly didn’t care much about getting a decent work out in) and a speed of 2.8-3.0. I then left the incline and sprinted for about 30-40 seconds. Dropped the incline to 0 and the speed to 1.0 and did walking lunges (20). Did this 4 times. I then did some ab work and burned in that 40 minutes 241 calories (35% from fat).

Came home and ate some cottage cheese. Saving some calories for a grill session with the boy in an hour or so.

That was my crazy life! Tomorrow I will train upper body. I really want to bench because I haven’t done it in a while but H wont be there. Leaving my back alone for a bit so I will focus on chest and tris. Always want to take my measurements tomorrow. I think I lost my originals so I am not happy but it is what it is. Hopefully I still have my first pictures so that will at least show some progress.

Buttttt I have been thinking that even though I am week 2 of my 4 week no cheat, I want to put in more work. I still have more than 3 months till this bikini comp (that I am training for) but I feel like I am not losing weight. Now, I tell all my clients not to worry about the scale instead focus on clothes fitting, how you feel and look in the mirror but your progress during your work out sessions. So why should I not take my own advice? I just feel like I am comparing myself too much to other girls (C to be exact) that I am not focusing on myself. I am still eating around 2000 calories (A LOT of room for changes) but I feel my mind is pushing me in two different directions. Like, get lean! and the other side is, be patient- focus on lifting! Shoot! One day at a time.. One DAY AT A T I M E!

ONE
DAY
AT
A
TIME.

Repeat over and over and over again. I need to focus one day at a time.

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(insert an awesome title here)!

*Have been trying to post this since last night. So yes, I am well aware today is not in fact sunday..

Sunday Funday! 

and 3 work outs later.. yep. That’s right, 3. I left the boys house around 10am and headed to the LA right by his house. I did 45 minutes of cardio 408 calories burned, 27% from fat. I went home, ate, and chit chatted with the mom. I then went to Round Lake for a full body work out, burning 813 calories, 40% from fat. I then went back home ate again, then went for an hour walk with mom and Marley. That I think burned 477 calories. That was a tough one. The minute I walked out there I started cramping up. Mom said we didn’t have to go the entire time but sometimes you just have to push yourself.

I have been working out a lot lately only having to take a few days off when I go up to Wisconsin for July 4th. Staying till sunday all I will be doing is practically eating and fishing lol. I don’t mind but definitely not a few hundred calorie work out… Planning to do a little run in the morning. Wake up run do some lunges squats.. you know a little cardio made fun. Can’t wait for the pictures to be taken. It is so beautiful I don’t think I’ll mind running one bit!

Yes.. that means I hate running.

Eating A LOT of eggs lately..

Eating A LOT of eggs lately..

Just a few things I have been eating..

GRAPENUTS ARE AMAZING. nuff' said.

GRAPENUTS ARE AMAZING. nuff’ said.

Still paying attention to what I am eating. Someone left a comment and asked if I changed my diet when I messed my shiat up… and to be honest if I did I wouldn’t remember enough to explain it. lol.. I just laid off it a bit (work out wise) and massaged the crap out of it. Speaking of which, I need to do more of. I barely stretch and I am ruining my body by not doing so (see below picture). That, or I am going to heavy too quickly. Take this picture I posted on instagram/fb the other day, hoping to get some answers..

photo 2

Do you see that dent in my leg? Apparently it’s from an IT band being too tight. Mostly likely resulting in a pulled/teared muscle. Yep. Lol. I will list the couple of websites that were posted to help explain it. I don’t have it on the other leg and it doesn’t hurt at all. Just.. weird looking. I may of first thought that it was water weight because I had a small indent in the back of my butt a little further down my hamstring. It went away the leaner I got though..

Interesting to say the least..
Last night, I went to the boys and wanted to go to dinner. While he was taking a shower I sat down and wrote my macros out. I was dead on with my carbs, a little lower on the calories but nowhere near the protein amounts. That being said, I knew I wanted a steak :). He threw out Joes Crab Shack and me being a non seafood person, meh but I agreed once I knew they served steaks. So I was excited. However, in the bathroom he was talking with a friend and “made plans” to meet at a pizza place. Now.. I wasn’t upset that he wanted to go with another couple even though I like spending time alone with him, nor was it the pizza place because this was IN FACT one of the pizza joints I am DYING to go.. it was the fact that I knew the majority of shit I’d be eating was carbs. That didn’t make me happy. I NEEDED more protein (I have been counting my macros for the last few days)!! 😦 So of course I practically through a fit because I suck at communication but seriously, don’t mess with me when it comes to food. But honestly, if I wasn’t competing or even thinking about competing I wouldn’t of cared. Could I have just dealt with it and went anyways? probably.. but who am I trying to impress? I don’t NEED to hang out with people (hence why I spend so much time at home) but what I do need to do is appreciate him and do things I sometimes don’t want to do for the sole fact of this relationship.. ugh.. always a work in progress.

MEEEEEEEEEAT!

MEEEEEEEEEAT!

*Sorry babe. I can tell you were some what upset about not hanging out with your friends just to please me. It makes me sad that I feel as selfish as I do. I don’t know. We made a pack tonight that we will work on things and I promise to keep that. But just know I am sorry okay?

So tomorrow gotta be up at 4:15 am to train a client. I will probably stay after my second to do 30 minutes of cardio before I go home. I don’t think I have any more clients till 2 because some of them are going on vacation. That will give me enough time to work out and finish the day around 9. I am leaving Wednesday night after work so getting in as many clients those 3 days as I can. So, I will be extremely tired even more than I normally am. Lucky for me, most of my next few days consist of fishing/ tanning on a boat. Looking forward to it, a little getaway. Hoping to hike this one mountain cliff thing down the street. We always pass it but the last few times we’ve been there to ice fish so obviously I aint doing shit that involves a lot of work outside in the cold. No. thank you. Not for me. Not going to happen. Ice fishing I’m at least sitting in a tent with a heater. I hate the cold. Everything about it :(.

I’ll be taking progress pictures soon (before and after vaca). Way too bloated the last few days so hoping when everything works its way out, I will be happy with what I see. Not saying I’m not. But I will be happy to wake up to my abs again. Working on those suckers too. Normally all I do is planks and I stick with a clean diet. But I want to see them more. Yes get lean but have them defined. Getting stronger though, no doubt. That’s one thing I wanted to talk about but think I should save it for another blog post. It’s in regards to how I want to be viewed by others. Not for the attention, nor would it matter what people had to say because I have heard it all before but it’s something I want people to get out of what I am trying to do.

About a week ago..

About a week ago..

Today 7/1/13

Today 7/1/13

7/1/13

7/1/13

Oh! You would think I should just blab it by now. But I want to put more thought into it unlike I feel like I do with most of these posts. I want this post to be meaningful because its something that gets brought up all the time in my life. How I view myself. A hard question that even right now, I wouldn’t be comfortable answering, but one in which I am working towards each and every day. So stay tuned. Or don’t, whatever ;P

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Paleomg Blueberry Muffins!

Holy crap. I skipped a workout (now have to try to get a workout in the rest of the week.. I do do stupid shit though.. squats in the bathroom, lunges in the middle of the road while the boo and I waited for the cops to leave a house so we could get our car on 4th of July..true story.. but what I am saying is this shit adds up.. you don’t think so but it does*).. and decided that I though I didn’t want to be working out I wanted to do something that still makes me enjoy life just a little bit more. I have been putting all fave recipes in a book, printing out recipes but not making them. So that’s what I was gonna do, bake.

Paleomg.com thank you.

I made your blueberry muffins and I loved them. Although I don’t eat paleo* the ingredients are so simple that I don’t discriminate 😉 and you’ll be thankful I don’t. This are magical. Obviously they have flour and sugar (honey, which is something I wanted to tweak), but these compared to a store bought one its almost dumb to waste all those stairmaster minutes on shit you didn’t need but wanted. hmmph.

Simple Blueberry Muffins

Prep time: 5 mins
Cook time: 20 mins
Total time: 25 mins
Serves: 8-10
Ingredients
Instructions
  1. Preheat your oven to 350 degrees.
  2. Mix all ingredients together in a bowl. If you’re good at baking, you’ll know to mix the dry then the wet ingredients then mix together, but I do all the ingredients together and it works out just fine.
  3. Place ingredients into 8-10 silicone muffin cups in a muffin tin. Or you can use muffin tin paper liners.
  4. Bake for 15-20 minutes. Just keep an eye on it, they will puff up and look adorable.
  5. Eat them and be happy. And merry.

Oh.. btw.. I have never cooked with honey and I wanted to mention something and then remembered something else about the honey.. it made the batter veryyyyyyyy sticky! Not joke that or I fucked up but they still tasted wonderful. I had to hand mix in the blueberries and was still having trouble.  so I made 6 kinda on the bigger side muffins because I only have a 12×12 pan or 6 muffin tin and this batter was ickkystickyy. I also want to try to sweeten it with a different kind of sugar.. organic cane.. blue agave syrup… trial and error 🙂

and I am a dumbass.

I was looking at the directions and read 8-10 .. literally were making these in a timely manner not reading further.. 15-20.. thank goodness I know to stick a fork inside to see how clean it comes out. These didnt after 8 min.. nor 10.. lol haha

But overall fucking great.. here is her pictures of the muffins and heres mine linking back to my instagram account..

Paleomg.com

They were wonderful (:

..and after I go to get the link for the pictures I see a carrot cake muffin.. hmm.. and instead of the cream she uses (or maybe I will).. these are the ingredients for the carrot cake muffins..

  • For the frosting
  • 1.5 cups raw cashews (unsalted)
  • 5 tablespoons Coconut Cream Concentrate
  • 1/3 cup canned coconut milk
  • 1 tablespoon Raw Honey
  • 2 teaspoons vanilla
  • 1/2 teaspoon cinnamon

Yum.

&& as it relate to my fitness life.. I am hanging in there… Not eating as much as I’d like and haven’t been doing enough cardio (on top of weight training) enough to feel “complete” lol. I am still a little soft in areas and have no doubt that will change with a little more plyometric based exercises and/or a little more time on my stairmastermister haaaa!
fuck.

Gotta love the ass that the stairmaster gives me!

..and a shit ton of squats and lunges.

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Day 93- 3 days left..

Wednesday, May 9th…

Woke up fat. No joke.

NO idea where my abs went. Possibly the more carbs I had yesterday due to a leg workout? UGH.

so guess what I did, I googled that shit.

Found the same shit I already knew, drink more water, sweat ext ext.. Did see something about preparation- H.. so I got it. Lmao. I am so bad. Do not follow what I do just yet.. the point of the cream is to apply it prior or cardio so it secretes the fluid out of that area…… *CROSSES FINGERS* *PRAYS* *BLOWS OUT A CANDLE* pleassssssssseeeeeeeeeee work..

I’ve had enough. 3 days. I can do this.

All I want is to finish this contest prep.. EAT like crap for 24 hours, then get back to my normal lifestyle. I want to eat fruit without guilt. I want to EAT TO GROW AND I WANT IT NOW!!!!!! I know I’ll lose my abs for a few days but I don’t care. You should see me at the gym late at night.. I am practically SLEEPING!!! I am trying so hard, then I beat myself up over the fact that it was possibly a shitty fucking workout. I need balance in my life. Balance and forgiveness, especially for oneself.

Alright so yesterday after my never ending work day I headed over to Taylor’s Salon after I walked Marley and ate really quick.. (@La Flavia Salon in IL).. I waited around for a bit, for her to finish with her last client then I was next! She ended up cutting about 4 inches off.. dry cut and everything. It. Looks. Awesome. Anyways after we were chit chatting.. she thought she was going to dye it as well.. well obviously a miscommunication.. haha.. so I am going back tomorrow (Thursday) for her to dye it and style it (just so I know what it looks like and if I want it up or down).. so yes.. any who.. after the haircut we went back to her house and she got ready and we hit the gym.

It was leg day.. the last leg day of this contest prep.  yep. and let me tell you I, my “rest” breaks were me shutting my eyes and trying to sleep. It was awful. The only bright side of this story is I lifted my heaviest.. weird? haha.. no joke.

Blah blah blah got home at 1130pm and passed the fuck out.

I did book the hotel, so that’s another thing off my list of things to do. Now its just a waiting game really lol. Playing around with my poses and how my “abs” look in certain poses.. I am def ready to get all pampered though. Taylor is going to do an amazing job I already know.. now if my body was up to par…..

UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! Don’t worry.. I’ll be confident up there because you really don’t have any other choice lmfao.. but deep down I could of done better. I just have to remind myself that I didn’t do this with the intention of trying to out beat every girl.. this was a personal goal.  Really just a set date that I needed to lose that god awful weight in and I think I at least accomplished that. Again.. just WAIT for the before and after pics.. I at least lost 25 SOLID POUNDS OF FAT. Ugh I was disgusting.

Alright that was my little update for you and again I apologize for the lack material in my blogs.. I PROMISEEEEE as soon as I get SOME energy I will put A LOT of effort into making this blog something special. I LOVE receiving the comments/feed back from you guys. It ALWAYS puts me in a better mood/ a smile on my face. So I thank you.

now, to leave you with a photo that have made my jaw drop today..

..talk about  motivation.

Now go work out! 😉

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Day 61 the harder the conflict, the more glorious the triumph.

The Diet

For some reason my pictures do NOT want to load.

930am Protein Shake (Dymatize, Strawberries, Flax, Ice, Water).
1pm 1/4lb Roast beef w/ almonds
430pm Blackened Chicken Breast w/ Soy Sauce w/ Almonds.
6pm More Almonds.. omg fml.
1030pm 2 Salt Free Rice Cakes w/ Protein Almond Butter *

*New and its AWESOME!!!!! 14g protein 4g carbs 6g fiber and only 1g of sugar 🙂

The Work Out

3 Supersets of Lying Chest Press & Flyes…

30lbs (each arm) x 12 reps w/

15lbs (each arm) x 8-10

4 sets of cable presses (weight unknown)

10 Minutes of Bosu Ball Burpees, 30 sec ski jumps and 15-25 Jump Squats*

*GREAT for your ass/legs..

5 Minute Planks

45 Min Cardio

Day 61 in pictures..

  1. A cool picture I took in the car…lol pointless but I didn’t have a morning picture.
  2. My good ol Blackened Chicken Breast.
  3. Recipe for blueberry muffins.. have another recipe I am going to try this weekend. Will post recipe tonight 🙂
  4. I cheated on Whole Foods :/
  5. I got (mostly for the day of my competition) but dried mango, and banana. Olive oil. Almonds. Apple Vinegar. Not pictured: Artichoke. Asparagus. Dark Chocolate.
  6. My plyo workout equipment. Don’t think you need a whole lot to work out.. 🙂
  7. This is ME. Today.
  8. Look what came while I was working out?!??!?!!?!?!??!!?!?
  9. A NEW CHOCOLATE ALMOND BUTTER!!!!!! 14 G Protein 4g Carb 6g Fiber and only 1 G of sugar. Fuck. Yes. and only $18.99 LMFAO.. I know I know… whatever.. and its awesome and still has only like 5 ingredients.. I still have yet to try my muscle egg lol and I just paid $75 for them. Yep. I am nuts.
  10. Last picture is me throwing away pointless oatmeal mixes. I just keep throwing away food and buying better shit.. it cost me a lot more to feed the mother (lol) but I rather her eat how I do then have to deal with stupid bullshit around the house.. I don’t know.. we shall see.

5 weeks out. kinda getting scared shitless because I don’t even have my suit. Yes that means I haven’t even ordered it. So yes that means I will pay an extra $50 to have it shipped and made sooner.

Life of a procrastinator = just paying more $$$ in the end lol. I swear it happens every time.. like when I decide not to pay my speeding tickets on time….. ohhhhhhhh will I ever learn. ALRIGHT well listen up PLEASEEEEEEE to who ever is reading this I BEG OF YOU please comment with your opinion. I am going to measure and put the final touches into making my bikini. I am so up in the air with what color I want that I am stressing out to the max. Not really (because I could always be more stressed lol), but this isn’t a good feeling. The only thing keeping me from breaking down is, as much as I don’t care for my first suit, I still have it. So all else fails, I do have a back up. So tomorrows post will be dedicated to my bikini choices.

So ever since it hit me that my show is around the corner, I have been stepping it up a notch. I am going to start my morning cardio tomorrow.. oh joy, and hopefully just keep leaning out. My legs are still pretty big (still have my ass though, so that is WONDERFUL), just need to stay positive 🙂 Not to mention I have a few tests this week, 2 classes, a 12 page paper due, a 40+ hour job and a thought process that lasts a solid 30 seconds. To think I am still sane. Ha.

This weekend will be a little light on the blogging, again tomorrow will be dedicated to my bikini, and hopefully get to relax a little. Enjoy the holidays and WORK OUT! & EAT CLEAN and here is some motivation and an AWESOME recipe to try.. gosh I am so darn thoughtful…. 😉

Buttery Apple Streusel Oat Squares

Adapted from Ashley’s apple toppingStrawberry Oat Squares, and pumpkin apple streusel muffins.

Ingredients:

For Oat Base:

  • 1.5 cups regular oats
  • 1 cup whole-grain Kamut flour (or whole wheat pastry flour or white/whole wheat)
  • 1/2 tsp baking soda
  • 1/2 tsp sea salt
  • 1/2 cup Sucanat sugar (or brown sugar)
  • 1 chia egg (1 tbsp chia seeds+ 4 tbsp warm water, mixed well and set aside for 5 mins)
  • 1/2 cup + 2 tbsp Earth Balance, melted
  • 1/4 cup pure maple syrup
  • 1 tsp pure vanilla extract
  • 2 tbsp almond milk

For Buttery Apple Mixture:

Ingredients:

  • 3 granny Smith Apples, peeled, thinly sliced, chopped (makes approx 3 cups, chopped)
  • 2 tbsp Earth balance or butter
  • 1 tbsp maple syrup or brown rice syrup
  • 1 tbsp Sucanat (or brown sugar)
  • 3/4 tsp cinnamon
  • 1/2 tsp ginger
  • 1/4 tsp nutmeg
  • Pinch sea salt

Apple Streusel Topping:

Ingredients:

  • 2 tbsp Sucanat (or brown sugar)
  • 1 tbsp Earth Balance or butter
  • 2 tbsp flour
  • 1/2 tsp ground cinnamon

Directions: Preheat oven to 350F. Line a square pan (I used a 9×9) with parchment paper and oil the sides of the pan and base. In a medium sized pot, add the apple mixture ingredients (chopped apples, Earth Balance, brown rice or maple syrup, spices). Heat over low, stirring frequently for about 10 minutes, until the apples soften and mixture thickens up.

In a small bowl, mix the chia or flax egg and set aside. In a large bowl, mix the oat base dry ingredients: oats, flour, Sucanat/brown sugar, baking soda, salt. In a small bowl, mix the melted earth balance, maple syrup, almond milk, vanilla, and chia egg. Stir well.

Add the wet mixture to the dry and mix well, using hands if necessary. Set aside 1/2 cup of the oat base mixture if desired. Pour the oat mixture onto the square pan and press down with fingers. Use a pastry roller to smooth out if desired. Pour on cooked apple mixture and smooth out. Make the apple streusel topping by mixing all ingredients together with a fork or fingers. Now sprinkle on the reserved 1/2 cup oat mixture and apple streusel topping and sprinkle over top.

Bake at 350F for approximately 30 minutes. Allow to fully cool for at least 30-40 minutes before gently removing from pan. You can firm them up in the fridge before slicing into squares or bars. The bars also freeze very well (I place them into a container in the freezer).

HOW GOOD DO THOSE LOOK??????????! and then we have her… who looks very good 😉

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Day 55 I couldn’t wait for success, so I went ahead without it.

THE WORKOUT

HAMMIES ALLLLLL DAY!

Was going to start with deadliest but some dbag.. once again, held one of the racks with his bag and didn’t come back till AFTER I was done.. so, started with

Step Ups 

30lb (DB, 60lb total) x 10 reps (each leg) x 3

Lunges 30lb (DB each) x20reps =

100 TOTAL LUNGES.. AGAIN!

Calf Raises

45lbs x 12 reps x 3

5Min Planks

Back Ext 

45lbs x 8 reps x 4

Day 55 In Pictures

  1. Breakfast shake (you guys should know whats in them by now) 😉
  2. Progress.  Legs are thinning out.
  3. Supersetted Legs today.
  4. Chipotle. YUM.
  5. Shopping for Sperrys @ Footloose in Deerfield. The guy brought out TEN boxes haha..
  6. No one has my size, and they are sold out. Everywhere. 😦
  7. Me doing my Nutrition HW.
  8. Ground Sirloin, Sweet Potatoes, and Broccoli.
  9. My “cheat”.. that BBQ sauce has a lot of sugar in it.. lol

 

Today was a good day. Started with a great leg work out.. Caught some guy starring and I made it obvious that I caught him and he didn’t care, he just kept starring. Weird. After that I went to lunch, then headed to a boutique to return shoes my mom got for me. I spent WAY to much time and fell in love with WAY to many things. I actually had to call and return a pair of shoes that were being shipped as we speak, because I found out the size was going to be to big (I tried one on at the store and the size 8 was too big), Zappos made it really easy though to have the product shipped and back to me on Tuesday. SCORE. Came home and showered finished eating and took Marley out then finished with a spray tan at quarter till 5. Now I am just going to chill, do some laundry and some hw and call it a mother fackin saturday night 🙂 mmmmmmm

* The last picture was my “cheat” lmao.. I only ate half…. but then woke up hungry (bc I had skipped my last meal bc I passed out, and ate the other half lol.. yes I will do 2 cardio sessions tomorrow… you know that BBQ sauce has a shit load of sugar in it!!!!!!)

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Day 27 randomly ranting

***** Sorry for the random posts! WP is going crazy on me, and is publishing things I don’t want to be published yet. My apologies!!!! This blog isn’t done yet…………..

Guys, if you want big legs you have got to squat. Girls, if you wanta shelf like, bangin’ ass you have got to squat. For the first few years of your training you should squat, squat and squat some more. Everyone’s goal should be to squat double bodyweight, at least. And I’m talking about real, full squats, at least to parallel.

Can you tell its Leg day today?

Should be after I ate 6 cookies last night. wtf? then my mom came in my room and asked if I had taken them, and I said yes. She asked what I did with them I said throw them out. I lied. She knew. She then saw the box on the end of the bed. UGH. I asked her, Im like WHAT ARE U TRYING TO DO MOM>>!>>!?!?!?

She said I need to figure out why Im doing this. and QUITE frankly. its BECAUSE I FUCKING SMOKE POT. THAT and because I was bored and have my period. I don’t know what else to say. I Had a perfectly fine day… I ate good all day. So I dk exactly what was a trigger, but the more that I think about it and try to solve it the more that it feels like a problem to me.

and I don’t want it to be a problem anymore.

I want to get past it. So thats what I plan on fucking doing.

So I will accept the fact that I ate 6 cookies last night and I will move on today without a care in the world.
I will also NOT do extra cardio to make up for the extra calories.
Iwilllovemyselfevenwhenidontwanttoo.

(Besides I did go a whole month without a cheat meal, usually id get 4 a month, lol but enough with the validation).

939am heading down stairs to make a meal. don’t know what though. Gonna hit legs at about noon.

1047am Had the last of my myofusion protein powder with super blend and coconut milk (a wonderful item I got at WF last night). I got my chicken breasts, coconut and almond milk. Edamame. Flaxseed Chips (pizza flavor), Kale Chips (DIS FUCKING GUSTING), and these 8 fucking dollar cookies that AGAIN TASTED AWFUL. ol. well 😦

and then I sat and talked with my mom for a little bit regarding addiction.

You can be addicted to ANYTHING, and its a a scary fucking thought. Some of us don’t even know it. I am trying to regain my life back everyday, and be stronger. I want my relationship with God stronger. I want to FINALLY live my life for me.

Randomly Ranting.

Getting pumped for the gym. Not so much deadlifts, because they hurt so bad (now that I’m finally going heavier!!!).. haha but Ill manage.

L I F T B I G !

12pm Hit legs HARD. Started with deadlift 12 12 10 8 6/ 50lbs 60lbs 70lbs 90lbs + bar

Resting was 10 bw squats in place.

35lb dumbbells 100 lunges

Lying down ham curl maxed OUT AT 50lbs lmao.

Then went and did 5 minutes of planks.

I was SHAKING after. Not to mention some girl at the front desk (who is always super pissed at me because I forget my key tag E V E R Y time.) well I didn’t have it again today 😦 but she asked me if I wanted to go to Sound Bar tonight lol.. why is it that everyone wants to go downtown tonight? Literally had 5 people ask me too?????

Was suppose to go see Nikki at World of Wheels but I didn’t wanna rush anything today so whatever.

115pm Chicken breast 1/2c rice and some 2% cheese.

(my cheat on the weekends are I am allowed to use cheese, condiments, and eat “more” carbs. Some people eat more PB, some actually go out and have a huge calorie/fat meal. Which is OK! it throws off your metabolism and makes it work harder). I choose not to do this anymore, or this time around because I can’t control my cheat meals. My cheat meal turns into a cheat day, so I will RESOLVE the issue, and continue to eat WHOLE foods through out this contest prep.

2pm I just finished a salt bath/bubble bath. I usually don’t take baths bc you just see yourself lying there all fat and shit. So I just take showers mostly. But to be honest, I am not THAT bad. I am white as fuck (tan skin always makes u look better), but def in good shape for being 10 weeks out 🙂 2 and 1/2 months. I could change lives in that amount of time. No reason I can’t do it myself :):):):):):):):)

In 4 days it will be 2 months since I quit smoking. WHATTTTT UPPPPP!!!! (stoked as fuck).

haha in about an hour or 2 I am going to start cooking. For todays MENU haha

Jamie Easons Turkey Meatballs
Black bean brownies
A pumpkinPizookie and
sweet potatoe fries. 🙂 YUM.

630pm Just ate the yummiest food ever.. okay so remember how my cheat meals consist of good eating? Well I wanted corn.. IVE BEEN HAVING WEIRD CRAVINGS FOR CORN! and so I got these single packs. So I heated one up, got some broccoli and my blackened chicken from Whole Foods and some lite sour cream and it was fucking delish. Like. really really good.

OH and I did have a weird craving for cookie and cream ice-cream and then I passed by Culvers and the flavor of the day is cookie dough craving.. are you fucking serious?

The one before that? Oreo

and before that? Chocolate covered strawberry

I am just assuming that since these are all of my fave, that the flavor of the day will be campfire smores. Ill be so fucking pissed.

Anywho, I’m staying in today. LIKE USUAL.. lol ill start going out later, but for now I enjoy my family/fitness lifestyle right now. It makes me happy. In the summer I will be better with the whole going out thing.

In a week or two my second class starts. Hmmmm SO Mon and Wed I have class. SO those are my two days off, (besides when I need to do my cardio in the am on an empty stomach) so that means I can miss any day because of OH IM TOO TIRED BLAHBLAHBLAH.\

Actually now that I graphed that out I may not need to have another day off. I just wouldn’t do cardio and still get a 45 min leg work in.. but its still possible. It just all depends on how my legs and butt come in.

And about the whole baking thing.. I don’t know about that. it is only 7pm, but I don’t know if Im going to fill up for it.. Maybe just the black bean brownies (because I am craving something chocolate no thanks to my lady friend), and save the rest for tomorrow, show Justina how to eat healthy lol.

so that means I should clean my room before I go to bed.

Church Tomorrow.. so church taxes workout – chill. haha ❤

So all I do is surf fitness related articles websites blogs, everything.. well I was looking over for a picture to put above and stumbled on lift big eat big (the sweatshirt I’ve posted before), and found it quite interesting. although I haven’t done their workouts, i wouldn’t mind trying.

The only reason I never did cross fit or any other designed program was bc when something was supersetted, I would literally have to either run across the gym to do so, or it was impossible because of the people, Id just get frustrated (yes my excuse) but Id gonna spend some more time on this site. Im always telling eric (who told me about it years ago) that I wanna do cross fit ( I would love to do the cross fit games actually) but I never do. Ugh.. maybe thats a goal for me, like add it to my bucket list. lol.

25 Tell-Tale Signs That You Lift Big & Eat Big

This post is dedicated to all the members of the Lift Big Eat Big club.
1.Your waist may be the same size it was in high school, but you still wear 2 pant sizes bigger so your ass will fit.
2. People never ask when you will be finished with the squat rack because they don’t want to be on the receiving end of your cobra death glare.
3. Going back for seconds is not a privilege, it’s a duty.
4.Over 75% of your Facebook friends are either shirtless or have weights in their hands. The other 25% are just family members.
5. You know squat.
6. The meal is not over when you are full, the meal is over when you hate yourself.
7. A fridge full of milk and meat should last you until the end of the week.
8. Your eye twitches every time you see a set of half-squats.
9. You spend each night refreshing your gym’s homepage, waiting to see tomorrow’s workout.
10. You keep an extra stick of deodorant on hand in case of a surprise outbreak of the meat sweats.
How I look heading into the 6AM class.
11. If you had a nickel for every time you explain that firming and toning is BS, you could retire.
12.You can walk into large groups of people on the sidewalk and they will always get out of your way.
13. No, it’s not like Zumba or P90X.
14. After a day of heavy 5×5, walking down stairs is the hardest task imaginable.
15. You enjoy blacking out as runners tell you about how great their endorphin high was.
16. You don’t need to go to go to the doctor, because squats and fish oil can cure every ailment.
17. You spend more time at work reading training logs than actually working.
18. You are happy when your butt looks big in those jeans.
19. The recession doesn’t worry you nearly as much as when your new shirt is coming in the mail.
20. Being called “skinny” is offensive.
21. Have some pain? There is a MOBWOD for that.
22. Yes fat is good for you, and you make sure that everyone knows it.
23. Males shy away from the squat rack when you warm up with their max.
24. Every shirt you own has a gym logo or workout reference on it.
25. You base others self worth on their TOTAL score.

I’ve been called a meat head before, and I took it as a compliment until I realized it means idiot. L M F A O.
Funny part is< i don’t think he knew what it meant either, and maybe he did but he wasn’t the type too make fun of me.. but I suppose its true now. hahahahha ohhhhh man. . But this is dope. Im just glad that people are into lifting as much as I am. I really would love to go pro. I think that should be on my bucket list too. I don’t see why I wouldn’t lol. The more the do it, the more my name will get out there and Im sure I wouldn’t step on stage if I looked like shit. Regardless its a GREAT time. I always get so nervous, but this is truly something I thought Id never be able to do. :):)

Makes me happy, knowing that I achieved something I never thought I would. and here I go again right? lol I really want a sexy suit though. I still haven’t really decided. I don’t want jennifers white one because I will ruin it with the tan, and the coral one won’t be ready. (btw never said anything but she asked to follow me on instagram haha!), so now I will keep searching till I see one that catches my eye. It will DEF have chains on the sides though.. OK ok pointless blogging..

I am going to see if this posts tomorrow at midnight, 12:01 actually, because thats what it is set for. But apparently it already posted…. bc WP was being all weird, but well see if that works.

AND BECAUSE of the OLYMPIA, that I didn’t go too :(:( But here is a beautiful 40 year old PRO! She is beautiful.

Cheryl Brown

Goodnight ❤

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Day 18 Motivational Rant

Maintaining Motivation

 

I don’t even know where to begin. Do I talk about how hard it was before? or the steps I am going to take now and for the rest of my life?

I would say lets be realistic here but I am going to stay on a positive note on this one. I am learning to love myself for who I am, for who God made me to be, everyday. No it hasn’t been easy TO SAY THE LEAST, but after looking back to everything I have been through (and more to come, BRING IT ON!), I know that it has been worth it.

My dictionary defines motivation as: “1) the reason or reasons behind one’s actions or behavior. 2) enthusiasm.”

My motivation is seeing past pictures of myself, and knowing what I did to get there. I remember those days, the night before my show seeing how flat my stomach really was, how PROUD I was….

Factors that Damage Motivation:

1) Low Self-Confidence – If you don’t have realistic confidence in your abilities you won’t even start. Building a healthy and realistic self-image is necessary to take action. The best way to build your confidence is just to start. Confidence is often a natural side effect of making steps in your personal development.

2) Arrogance – This is the opposite of low self-confidence, and it too adversely effects motivation. Overconfidence can often result to some very painful failures when reality confronts your self-image. Arrogance often goes hand in hand with ignorance. If you start educating yourself, you will soon realize how much you need to learn, which can help reduce an inflated ego.

3) Past Failures – Failure can often damage motivation. The key to recover this motivation is to set yourself up for some successes. Remember to take steps to learn from your failures so they become a learning opportunity rather than a blow to your ego.

I don’t think I will EVER turn down the roads that brought me here today, ever again. I actually FULLY understand the reasons of my “failures” or my weaknesses and  I am finally in CONTROL, and I have never felt better.

I am staying positive.

I am staying true to MYSELF.

I am happy.

Besides getting down yesterday about a test (that I thought I for sure was going to ace), I overate (technically I didn’t but it was a lot of carbs) and though it was all clean food it shouldn’t matter, the fact that I did it NEEDS to be mentioned. I didn’t have cravings for shitty food, I just had craving for food. Maybe it had to do with the test and those results? Maybe I was bored?

Whatever the reasons may be, I need NOT to punish myself.

Am I normal? Am I the only one with these thoughts? Am I the only one that thinks about food ALL the time? Am I the only one that researches and googles fitness related articles ALL day?

Yes I know  I’m not, but if only people realized how much this has and does effect me. Fitness is my life.

A HEALTHY LIFESTYLE is now my life.

 

TALK ABOUT MOTIVATION!!!!!!!!!

Oh another rant eh?

830am Finished my protein shake (yes it is ALWAYS THE SAME MON-FRI LOL)

1030am and I’m fucking starving.
I am finishing up taking pictures for work and then I am going to head over to Chase.. Ugh got a late fee for my CC that I JUST got down to 22% interest lol.. SAME DAY PAY MY ASS!

then I will head to whole foods because I forgot my food again.. fucking idiot I am… maybe not an idiot but a straight up basket case.

1237pm Just got back from whole foods.. spent $15 exactly. 2 chicken breast, 2 Justin’s all natural almond butter, and a mix of edama carrots and asparagus. YUM!

 

then I left to marios (pizza joint) to get Ron and I a drink and this is the second time (once yesterday) that someone told me I had nice skin.. awe 🙂

5pm PEOPLE DO NOT KNOW HOW TO DRIVE! 😦 Snowflakes were HUGE today SUPER COOL! so I took the Charger home, sucky on gas but its great in the snow.

Got home around 6pm, got Marley out. Ate some “meatloaf, ” tuna and some broccoli OH AND some PB 😦 Probably shouldn’t of eaten the tuna (because my mom puts mayo) but it tasted GREAT. haha and now I write it in, shouldn’t of eaten the PB either lol.

Shoulders/Chest today

 

Started with Seated Shoulder Press (30lbs each arm)

3×8-10 reps

in-between front raises (20lb BB)

3×12 reps

The last 3 reps of each seated s. press got extremely hard and I had no spotter, so I did 3 reps (each arm) squat to shoulder press.

Moved onto Lying (chest) flyes (15lb each arm)

3×12 reps 

in between  lateral raises (10lbs each arm)

3x10reps

finished with cable machine shoulder press.. don’t know the weight they just have numbers, it was pretty heavy got about 8 reps 4 times.

I did 2 sets of planks :30 sec each time.

with 25 min STAIRMASTER.

And boy was I sweating. I felt my ass muscles burning and it felt great.

8:43pm Myofusion and PB2 (even though I shouldn’t of put the pb2 in there. I had enough fat today).

I am going to finish up editing this a bit, throw in some cool pictures :):) Nothing too exactly today.. Boss is getting nicer (I work at a body shop FULL OF DUDES THAT PMS MORE THEN EVERY FEMALE I KNOW COMBINED!).. but its a dope job and for the most part enjoy the people I work with.. sucks its as far as it is though :/ (about 45 min-60min on a bad day).. OTher then that I am pretty excited this week is almost over.. I love cuddling and knowing I have no schedule, no where to be, no clock to have to set, nothing. Ugh.. best feeling in the world. ❤

 

1115pm Just finished showering and made the chickpea snicker doodle blondies. and let me tell you the batter was AMAZING… they fell apart 😦 and I think I should of put raisins in the whole thing and not just half.. but overall they were great..

 

goodnight ❤

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