Tag Archives: Turkey

Day 81 I want carbs.

“Officially” 2 weeks out.

(“officially” because technically I am 2 weeks out on Saturday, but I won’t be working out or doing much of anything really.. )

How am I feeling?  Like I want to get this all over with so I can finally breathe and think about something other then myself.  Not even that.. I am stalking the SHIT out of people who are competing and currently dieting for shows, and I am continuously comparing myself and that’s the LAST thing anyone should do, competing or not. 2 weeks. I can do this. It’s been over 2 months, and I am bitching about 2 weeks left? I need to get my head out of my ass.

The Food Log/ The Workout..

I ate great all day, a little less then I would of liked in the morning but no big deal. I did “overeat” by eating a piece of chicken and 1/2 a turkey burger but I suppose it was 2 hours after my last feeding, so I’ll leave the validation there.

I didn’t do morning cardio, but I went to the gym with Taylor at 830pm.

We did a little chest, then went and did 4 rounds of jump squats, bosu jumps, and advanced planks.

Then finished with 3 sets of planks, and 60 minutes of cardio.

Day 81 in Pictures..

  1. After the kids went to school, I made breakfast at my bosses house.. (spinach tasted like ass).
  2. I had to fight like hell and fighting like hell made me what I am.
  3. Whole Foods- Second run of the day.. (first trip cost me $25 for lunch), this one was about $52.. Detox tea, lemon, cranberry juices are for the detox in a week… coconut milk (for amazing whipping cream later), and about 3lbs of meat 🙂
  4. Protein Pancake (Just muscleegg and pb2).
  5. 1000 followers on Instagram ❤
  6. Taylors doggie.
  7. My mom grilled for me while I was away burning calories 🙂

So today was a little long, tomorrow will be even longer.. Had to leave at 630am to take my bosses kids to school. Missed cardio in the morning, but I WAS DEAD. and you know what.. I don’t care, obviously my body needed it.. because I would of been up regardless of how unhappy I may be at the time. Anywho did my day to day shit and got home around 630pm because I stopped at Whole Foods to get some meat for my mom to grill while I work out.  I did go to Libertyville Xsport to meet up with Taylor (who is literally going to be my new best friend), got into a little drama* and was in bed by midnight. Then knocked the FUCK out.

* My ex co workers boyfriend went up to Taylor and started a little small talk with her regarding something about tanning (idk I was working out, so I only heard a little bit of the convo).. so while on the treadmill I saw him again, so it reminded me to text her since I haven’t heard from her in awhile.. the convo went a little like this..

Hey, youre boyfriend is at xsport!
Her: Who is this new phone sorry
Marissa
Her: oh hey! which one?
Libertyville
Her: Did he say anything to you?
No to my friend though
Her: Oh being flirty?
no, just something about tanning I dont know..
Her: Oh okay, so how are you……. blahblahblah

Taylor and I were walking out and as we split ways, I see Nicole’s boyfriend sitting on the curb, and as soon as he sees me he comes up to me, IN MY FACE, and starts bitching at me because I’m causing drama and I said that he was flirting with Taylor and all this fucking bullshit. I was like WTF? I was like are you for real right now? Grow the fuck up. I didn’t do or say shit except  hey your boyfriend is at X sport. Told her you didn’t do shit, check her phone you fucking pansy (insert a SHIT ton more foul language).. I was so pissed at this point.. then he says something like “I don’t want to see you back here.” Are you fucking kidding me right now? UNbelieveable. Lmfao.

Yeah, great relationship that must be.

Anywho.. hope everyone stayed true to themselves and their goals today!

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Day 25 Patience, or lack thereof.

I’m feeling a little down today. I’m not focusing. I’m lifting really heavy, but not doing cardio, Im trying to be patient. I cant rush, and do hours of cardio to lose body fat.

Did I tell you I have no patience?

Patience is the art of concealing your impatience.

Well guess I’m not concealing very well.. because this is my weakness part about me, is the fact that I’m impatient. I get impatient about everything (HENCE MY ROAD RAGE)! Here I am trying to practice happiness and stopping to enjoy life for once, and I’m rushing in EVERY aspect of my life.
It IS different when it involves losing weight though, because you want to just start feeling and looking good. But its never like that.

and texting my friend who has said for months that hes tired of feeling like shit, after ADMITTING he just didn’t care enough to make changes. Even when his own mother would ridicule him, he said he didn’t want it enough, has been working his butt off at the gym and finally eating healthy! But he mentioned how he wasn’t losing weight fast enough. DON’T GET CARRIED AWAY!


Losing weight, and KEEPING IT OFF takes time!It took longer then a few weeks to do the damage that has been done to our bodies, it’s going to take longer then a few weeks to repair it.

Unless youre on a TV show and all you do is workout and eat rabbit food, be prepared for this to be a LIFELONG CHALLENGE.

For me and dieting for a competition I’m on a time limit. I will NOT force myself, but I don’t think i’m paying attention. Monday will mark 10 more weeks.  Which is still more then 2 months away and is still A LOT of time. Most people start 9 weeks out, so I think I’m on the right track, that and I’M FUCKING PUMPED EVERY SINGLE FUCKING DAY to lift. UGh its SUCH a great feeling.

BUT I was feeling down. 😦 I looked in the mirror today and look no where near where I should be. But I have to realize that everything WILL be okay 🙂 I can’t expect miracles lol.

I guess what I’m saying is I haven’t started giving 100% yet… :/

But thinking back to my post that was suppose to be yesterday (which I was super excited about then it just decided to RANDOMLY delete.. nobigfuckingdeal right? lol yeah not anymore) was that I went to the gym after class because I missed Tuesday’s leg workout.

So 7am UP 8-4work 5-8class 9-10pm gym then I stayed up writing the mysteriously deleted blog, then I went to sleep haha.. so maybe I am focusing and just not giving myself the credit I deserve, because it was a BAD ASS leg workout. Didn’t max out but hit 320 on the Leg Press Machine 🙂 and did 100 lunges (w 60 lbs/bw)

Whatever it may be, I’m slowly learning and that’s good enough for me.

Learn what patience is and ways to recognize and overcome your impatience triggers. Steps you can follow to help identify what makes you lose your patience.

A tendency to be impatient is considered a major personality flaw. People who suffer from severe impatience are often considered to be arrogant, insensitive, and overbearing. Impatience can cause a person to cut others off mid-sentence and to make what appear to be uninformed, quick judgements.

  • Traffic
  • Ignorant People
  • Rude/mean People
  • Being late
  • Being lost
  • WEIGHT LOSS

These are legit my triggers. I just have to keep praying for the strength to overcome all this. Life is short and is sure as hell not promised or guaranteed. So why not make the best out of every day?

Not to forget in yesterdays post I made a comment about how I received alot of views which i was SUPPPPPPER excited about (someone linked my profile to pinterest). Put a smile on my face.

PINTEREST: shititsmar

800am Had my myofusion superblend protein shake

915am eating an orange.

1030am ate my justins almond butter. I’m not drinking enough water to stay full 😦

1111am ALWAYS SO FREAKING HUNGRY@!

1145am ate half my chicken breast.

Stuffed Green Peppers with Brown Rice, Italian Sausage, and Parmesan
(Makes 4 large stuffed green peppers, recipe created by Kalyn when her market had a great sale on peppers!)

1 C long-grain brown rice (I used Uncle Ben’s Brown Rice, but any long-grain rice will work.)
4 large green bell peppers, bottom trimmed, cap end cut off and diced, and seeds removed
1 large onion, diced
2 tsp. + 1 tsp. olive oil
2 links (about 8 ounces) turkey Sweet Italian Sausage (or other sausage of your choice. Use diced mushrooms instead of sausage for vegetarian version.)
1/2 tsp. ground fennel
1/2 tsp. dried Greek or Turkish oregano
1/2 cup grated Parmesan cheese
salt and fresh ground black pepper to taste
1/4 cup grated mozzarella cheese

Cook rice according to package directions, or using a rice cooker. (Rice can be cooked ahead and used in this recipe later.)

Preheat oven to 375F/190C. Trim bottom of bell peppers so they have a flat surface to stand on. Cut off a fairly generous amount of the stem end of peppers, then remove seeds. Place hollowed-out peppers in a baking dish that you’ve sprayed with non-stick spray or olive oil. (A dish that’s close in size to the peppers will work best.)

Remove stem part from the pepper caps and trim off any white membrane, then dice pepper caps and the onion into fairly small dice. Heat 2 tsp. olive oil in a large skillet, then saute diced pepper and onion for 3-4 minutes, until they are starting to soften but aren’t browned. Remove pepper-onion mixture to a bowl, add 1 tsp. more olive oil, then squeeze sausage out of the casing and cook until it’s lightly browned, breaking apart with the back of the turner.

Put the onion-pepper mixture back into the pan with the sausage, add the dried spices, and saute 2-3 minutes to blend the flavors. Then add cooked rice and Parmesan cheese, season the mixture with salt and fresh ground black pepper to taste, and cook just long enough to warm, about 1-2 minutes.

Stuff the filling mixture into the hollowed-out peppers, using a spoon to press the mixture down so it’s tightly packed into the pepper shell. (A few years ago I stopped pre-cooking the peppers before stuffing, and now I prefer peppers that are stuffed raw.) If you have any extra filling, you can put it in a small ramekin and bake along with the peppers. Bake peppers for 30 minutes, then remove from oven and put a generous pinch of grated mozzarella on top of each pepper. Put peppers back into the oven and bake about 10-15 minutes more, until cheese is melted and lightly browned. Serve hot.

Found this recipe for stuffed peppers. HOLY SHIT am I super excited.
http://www.kalynskitchen.com/2010/09/recipe-for-stuffed-green-peppers-with.html

12:43pm Going to finish my 1/2 of that chicken breast 🙂

Found out we MAY not do Big Buck this year or at least not in Minnesota. Wtf? whatever. no big deal.

358pm should of ate by now but super excited about these pictures hahah. but just got back from whole foods. spend 40 at whole foods and they are all my snacks which are PERFECT MUNCHIES!

500pm I ate what I got from whole foods, Ill just show you 😉

It was ground Turkey Pico de gallo and broccoli. FUCKING YUM! I was even thinking about going back for more Ground Turkey but I didn’t lol 😦

600pm I then went and did shoulders 🙂 Killed it, almost backed out a little bit because  my shoulder gave out> Got a little scared :/ But it was fine, did 6 sets of squat to shoulder press 40 lb x 10reps. 5 minutes of planks :):)

25min on the treadmill

800pm Chicken Brown Rice 2tbs light sour cream

Finishing up blogging and shit. probably going to grab a protein shake later if I stay up late enough but gotta get this shit done. So when  I got home…. :):):):)  I came upstairs and saw something on my desk AND OMG my mom got me sperry’s!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHH they’re not the right color but Mine I can’t get till june :(:(

LOOK AT MY LOVELY MAGAZINE ARTICLES!!!!!!!! I loved this months magazine ❤ Makes so much and I got super excited reading it. Just and enjoy

Happiness is an inside job. Nothing externally can make you happy. People, places, and things- they can’t make you happy. Only you can.”

How beautiful.

 

Goodnight ❤

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Day 13 If you ever want to know how Hell feels, have food control your life.

“Belief in oneself is one of the most important bricks in building any successful venture”.

I have been reading a few blogs lately, so I get the feel of WordPress, and the blogs I do check out are normally fitness based (same goes for instagram and pinterest). Browsing the blogs have made me open my eyes to the similarities in my life, to other peoples. To see someone blogging about going through what I have gone through, makes me a little on edge. I am a very emotional person and it’s hard not being able to comfort someone going through what they are going through and knowing how they feel. I guess maybe I should be a tad bit more open.. I’ve battled eating disorders for 8 years now, everything from Bulimia, Anorexia, to Binge Eating to BDD (Body Dysmorphic Disorder). I’ll go more in depth about it down the road, but I did want to mention a little something about it. And to everyone that IS going through something like this, get in touch with someone, or write it all down. I didn’t want to talk to anyone, I was going to gain control on my own. And gain control I did. You have to BELIEVE that you are better then this. That FOOD WILL NOT CONTROL YOUR LIFE LIKE IT HAS BEEN. No joke. STOP EATING SHIT. I probably ate over 5,000 calories a day and I did that for 2 weeks. Whatever the FUCK I wanted, I ate it and BOY did it all taste so FUCKING GOOD! I never weighed myself but my clothes fit horribly, I felt horrible, and you best believe I fucking looked horrible. I straight up stopped giving a shit, and not just about anything but MYSELF. The only thing I have in this world, the only thing that can make me happy, I was slowly destroying.  I have no idea why (I have a slight idea how it all started but that is another page, another day). I was in a horrible funk, my mother knew and it was embarrassing because I ate A L O T . She even said  “Marissa you should feel lucky, with how much you ate you should be well over 200lbs”… and she was right. It felt disgusting having extra weight on my body, it was an unnatural feeling and I HATED IT). Then one day I quit smoking cold turkey. I binged for 4 weeks and the day that marked one month of not one puff, I asked God to help me and I just stopped. Just like my addiction to nicotine, I quit my addiction to sugar, to food, just like that. I took back control of my life and have never felt stronger.

ANYWHO!

I am on to bigger and better things now. I can finally breathe ❤

It’s 1130am, don’t worry I’ve been up already. Made some blueberry (and blackberry) breakfast cakes and they weren’t as good as I expected. It was nice to eat carbs but it was really bland. I ended up trying to added Sugar Free raspberry jelly.. it was OK (I bet if I added PB and the Sugar Free Jelly it would of tasted ALOT better.. I’ll try it when I get downstairs), I tried it with sprinkled stevia on top (probably the best), and Sugar Free Syrup. LOL… so obviously it was added calories…… GRRR.. OH and I added too many blueberries.. such a thing? yeah….

It looks ALOT better then it tasted :/

So I’m gonna lay around and be a bum till my next meal (2pm), make cauliflower pizza (YUM!) then head to the gym to do arms.. which is my least favorite 😦 (only because I don’t have definition like I’d like).

Around 230pm I made my cauliflower pizza, and of course it was amazing. I did add a little cayenne pepper and red pepper to the crust. Honestly, the smell that came from the oven when I opened it was A M A Z I N G. You guys NEED to make this.. yes its a little pain in your ass , but it is worth it.

So I waited till that digested a bit.. oh yeah, my pictures just finished uploading and I forget to mention that I almost ate an entire bag of corn. I don’t know why, but I couldn’t stop. Okay, I could of stopped but I didn’t want to. It was just so fucking good. :/

(Getting rid of this Earth Balance shit. It has some weird shit in it and I don’t like it, even if its vegan).

Got to the gym @ 3:45pm. Started with Barbell (BB) bicep curls for 3 rounds of 12 reps @ 30lbs. In between I did standing skull crushers, so 3 rounds of 10 reps @ 20lbs. Not going to lie.. I was already dying at this point.

I then moved to the cable machines. I haven’t used cables in a while but I love them (especially for arms). I did 6 sets of triceps pushdowns

  • Set 1: 12 reps x 60 lbs
  • Set 2: 12 reps x 60 lbs
  • Set 3:  12 reps x 70 lbs (was actually still pretty light right here)
  • Set 4: 10 reps x 80 lbs
  • Set 5: 7-8 reps x 90 lbs
  • Set 6: 5 reps x 10 100 lbs

In between sets 1, 2 and 3 I did 10 bench dips. 

After this, my triceps were on fire. I moved over to a different cable machine because I couldn’t move the bar down and I needed to for the next excerise. I started with 50 lbs and did a cable bicep curl moved up to 60 lbs but only did 3 sets. I went into the yoga room and did 3 sets of Dumbbell (DB) bicep curls followed with burps (with shoulder press- bosu ball). I was sweating and it hurt so bad. I finished with planks and couldn’t move. Caught my breath, and drove home =D

Immediately made a green smoothie. I mixed the ALIVE! pea protein powder, L-Carnitine, Almond Milk, Water, Mangoes, Strawberries, and a small banana. Doesn’t taste bad actually. =D

The longer I’m blogging and reading other blogs I am actually pretty excited about how everything is going. I am going to clean my room and finish laundry. I’m going to make Turkey Meatballs for dinner and relax with a nice bubble bath, I’m feeling pretty sore.. I do wanna post a separate blog regarding Running, L-Carnitine and Trigger Foods. Maybe if I get bored tonight I’ll write an extra blog ❤

*Brainy quotes.com

625pm Just finished up making a turkey meatloaf.. Meatloaf not meat loaf muffins.. I wanted to try something different (and hopefully the cooking time is the same) and put it in a semi circle glass ware and put a think layer of ketchup on the top.. Hmmmm in 40 min well see I guess. This blog has been pretty boring because I have been pretty boring, and I apologize about that. It will start getting interesting when I start putting progress pictures and I get closer to my compeition date.

HOLY SHIT I FORGOT ABOUT THE MEATLOAF!

Lol.. it was actually a good thing I went downstairs. The TIME SHUT OFF! ugh! lol I had to guess and check, but it turned out great! a little dry but it was actually really good. I had a portion 😉

(sorry don’t know why and how I can change the view.. lol)..

Alright its about 9:30pm. I’m going to head to bed, so I can wake up for church tomorrow. I am also going to make healthy sugar cookies.. yeah remember how I said I don’t eat sugar anymore?? hmmm maybe I lied. 😉 lol Look how cute they look..

Goodnight ❤

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